I want to build my own Stealthfighter

[Ralf Dieholt]

Because I´m an evil megalomaniac and I will destroy all cities in the
world with atom bombs.

What do I need for a good Stealth bomber ?

[Stealth Pilot]

On 22 Feb 2004 00:13:10 -0800, (Ralf Dieholt)
wrote:

>Because I´m an evil megalomaniac and I will destroy all cities in the
>world with atom bombs.
>
>What do I need for a good Stealth bomber ?

dry fibreglass aircaft like a longeze with radar absorbent paint in
the engine bay, wooden prop. nylon wheel hubs.
that ought to do it,

Stealth Pilot

[Ron Wanttaja]

On 22 Feb 2004 00:13:10 -0800, (Ralf Dieholt) wrote:

>Because I´m an evil megalomaniac....

What, a zeppelin's not good enough for you? :-)

Ron "Traditionalist" Wanttaja

[Cy Galley]

MONEY lots of Money!

"Ralf Dieholt" > wrote in message
om...
> Because I´m an evil megalomaniac and I will destroy all cities in the
> world with atom bombs.
>
> What do I need for a good Stealth bomber ?

[JFLEISC]

OK, I have a question on this subject. What about a fabric covered wood plane?
Would the "aluminized" paint for UV protection have the same radar reflection
as an aluminum airframe?

Jim

[C J Campbell]

"Ralf Dieholt" > wrote in message
om...
> Because I´m an evil megalomaniac and I will destroy all cities in the
> world with atom bombs.
>
> What do I need for a good Stealth bomber ?

The last guy who said he wanted to be invisible and to fly was Pee Wee
Herman. He was an evil megalomaniac, too.

[Rich S.]

"JFLEISC" > wrote in message
...
> OK, I have a question on this subject. What about a fabric covered wood
plane?
> Would the "aluminized" paint for UV protection have the same radar
reflection
> as an aluminum airframe?

ATC has no problem getting a primary return on my Emeraude.

Rich S.

[nafod40]

Ralf Dieholt wrote:
> Because I´m an evil megalomaniac and I will destroy all cities in the
> world with atom bombs.
>
> What do I need for a good Stealth bomber ?

Sharks. With laser beams on their heads.

You'll need this information as well...

Advice That Every Evil Overlord Should Heed
Being an Evil Overlord seems to be a good career choice. It pays well,
there are all sorts of perks, and you can set your own hours. However
every Evil Overlord I've read about in books or seen in movies
invariably gets overthrown or destroyed in the end. I've noticed that no
matter whether they are barbarian lords, deranged wizards, mad
scientists or alien invaders, they always seem to make the same basic
mistakes every single time. With that in mind, allow me to present:

The Top 117 Things I'd Do/Don't Do If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord:
1. My Legions of Terror will have helmets of clear Plexiglas, not
face-concealing ones.
2. My ventilation ducts will be too small to crawl through.
3. My noble half-brother whose throne I usurped will be killed not kept
anonymously imprisoned in a forgotten cell of my dungeon.
4. Shooting is not too good for my enemies.
5. The artifact, which is the one source of my power, will not be kept
on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the
Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies
to the object which is my one weakness.
6. I will not gloat over my enemy's predicament before killing them.
7. When I've captured my adversary and he says, "Look, before you kill
me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?" I'll say, "No,"
and shoot him. No, on second thought I'll shoot him then say "No".
8. After I kidnap the beautiful princess, we will be married immediately
in a quiet civil ceremony, not a lavish spectacle in three weeks' time
during which the final phase of my plan will be carried out.
9. I will not include a self-destruct mechanism unless absolutely
necessary. If it is necessary, it will not be a large red button labeled
"Danger: Do Not Push." The big red button marked "Do Not Push" will
instead trigger a spray of bullets on anyone stupid enough to disregard
it. Similarly, the ON/OFF button will not clearly be labeled as such.
10. I will not interrogate my enemies in the inner sanctum--a small
hotel well outside my borders will work just as well.
11. I will be secure in my superiority. Therefore, I will feel no need
to prove it by leaving clues in the form of riddles or leaving weaker
enemies alive to show they pose no threat.
12. One of my advisors will be an average five-year-old child. Any flaws
in my plan he is able to spot will be corrected before implementation.
13. All slain enemies will be cremated, or at least have several rounds
of ammunition emptied into them, not left for dead at the bottom of the
cliff. The announcement of their deaths, as well as any accompanying
celebration, will be deferred until after the aforementioned disposal.
14. The hero is not entitled to a last kiss, a last cigarette, or any
other form of last request.
15. I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find
that such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate
when the counter reaches 117 and the hero is just putting his plan into
operation.
16. I will never utter the sentence, "But before I kill you, there's
just one thing I want to know."
17. When I employ people as advisors, I will occasionally listen to
their advice.
18. I will not have a son. Although his laughably under-planned attempt
to ursurp would easily fail, it would prove a fatal distraction at a
crucial time.
19. I will not have a daughter. She would be as beautiful as she was
evil, but one look at the hero's rugged countenance, and she'd betray
her own father.
20. Despite its proven stress-relieving effect, I will not indulge in
maniacal laughter. When so occupied, it's too easy to miss unexpected
developments that a more attentive individual could adjust to accordingly.
21. I will hire a talented fashion designer to create original uniforms
for my Legions of Terror, as opposed to some cheap knock-offs that make
them look like Nazi storm troopers, Roman foot soldiers, or savage
Mongol hordes. All were eventually defeated, and I want my troops to
have a more positive mind-set.
22. No matter how tempted I am with the prospect of unlimited power, I
will not consume any energy field bigger than my head.
23. I will keep a special cache of low-tech weapons and train my troops
in their use. That way--even if the heroes manage to neutralize my power
generator and/or render the standard-issue energy weapons useless--my
troops will not be overrun by a handful of savages armed with spears and
rocks.
24. I will maintain a realistic assessment of my strengths and
weaknesses. Even though this takes some of the fun out of the job, at
least I will never utter the line, "No! this cannot be! I AM
INVINCIBLE!" (After that, death is usually instantaneous).
25. No matter how well it would perform, I will never construct any sort
of machinery which is completely indestructible except for one small and
virtually inexcusable vulnerable spot.
26. No matter how attractive certain members of the rebellion are, there
is probably someone just as attractive who is not desperate to kill me.
Therefore, I will think twice before ordering a prisoner sent to my
bedchamber.
27. I will never build only one of anything important. All-important
systems will have redundant control panels and power supplies. For the
same reason, I will always carry at least two fully loaded weapons at
all times.
28. My pet monster will be kept in a secure cage from which it cannot
escape and into which I could not accidentally stumble.
29. I will dress in bright and cheery colors, and so throw my enemies
into confusion.
30. All bumbling conjurers, clumsy squires, no-talent bards and cowardly
thieves in the land will be preemptively put to death. My foes will
surely give up and abandon their quest if they have no source of comic
relief.
31. All naive, busty tavern wenches in the realm will be replaced with
surly, world-weary waitresses who will provide no unexpected
reinforcement and/or romantic subplot for the hero or his sidekick.
32. I will not fly into a rage and kill a messenger who brings me bad
news, just to illustrate how evil I truly am. Good messengers are hard
to come by.
33. I won't require high-ranking female members of my organization to
wear a stainless-steel bustier. Morale is better with a more casual
dress code.
Similarly, outfits made entirely from black leather will be reserved for
formal occasions.
34. I will not turn into a snake. It never helps.
35. I will not grow a goatee. In the old days they made you look
diabolic. Now they just make you look like a disaffected member of
Generation X.
36. I will not imprison members of the same party in the same cellblock,
let alone the same cell. If they are important prisoners, I will keep
the only key to the cell door on my person instead of handing out copies
to every bottom-rung guard in the prison.
37. If my trusted lieutenant tells me my Legions of Terror are losing a
battle, I will believe him. After all, he's my trusted lieutenant.
38. If an enemy I have just killed has a younger sibling or offspring
anywhere, I will find them and have them killed immediately, instead of
waiting for them to grow up harboring feelings of vengeance towards me
in my old age.
39. If I absolutely must ride into battle, I will certainly not ride at
the forefront of my Legions of Terror, nor will I seek out my opposite
number in his army.
40. I will be neither chivalrous nor sporting. If I have an unstoppable
super weapon, I will use it as early and as often as possible instead of
keeping it in reserve.
41. Once my power is secure, I will destroy all those pesky time-travel
devices.
42. Whenever I capture the hero, I will also make sure I get his dog,
monkey, ferret, or whatever sickeningly cute little animal capable of
untying ropes and filching keys happens to follow him around.
43. I will maintain a healthy amount of skepticism when I capture the
beautiful rebel and she claims she is attracted to my power and good
looks and will gladly betray her companions if I just let her in on my
plans.
44. I will only employ bounty hunters who work for money. Those who work
for the pleasure of the hunt tend to do dumb things like even the odds
to give the other guy a sporting chance.
45. I will make sure I have a clear understanding of who is responsible
for what in my organization. For example, if my general screws up, I
will not point my weapon at him, say "And here is the price for
failure", then suddenly turn and kill some random underling.
46. If an advisor says to me, "My liege, he is but one man. What can one
man possibly do?", I will reply, "This", and kill the advisor.
47. If I learn that a callow youth has begun a quest to destroy me, I
will slay him while he is still a callow youth instead of waiting for
him to mature.
48. I will treat any beast which I control through magic or technology
with respect and kindness. Thus if the control is ever broken, it will
not immediately come after me for revenge.
49. If I learn the whereabouts of the one item which can destroy me, I
will not send all my troops out to seize it. Instead I will send them
out to seize something else and quietly put a Want-Ad in the local paper.
50. My main computers will have their own special operating system that
will be completely incompatible with standard IBM and Microsoft or Mac
PowerBooks.
51. If one of my dungeon guards begins expressing concern over the
conditions in the beautiful princess's cell, I will immediately transfer
him to a less people-oriented position.
52. I will hire a team of board-certified architects and surveyors to
examine my castle and inform me of any secret passages and abandoned
tunnels that I might not know about.
53. If the beautiful princess that I capture says, "I'll never marry
you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!!", I will say "Oh well" and kill her.
54. I will not strike a bargain with a demonic being then attempt to
double-cross it simply because I feel like being contrary.
55. The deformed mutants and oddball psychotics will have their place in
my Legions of Terror. However before I send them out on important covert
missions that require tact and subtlety, I will first see if there is
anyone else equally qualified who would attract less attention.
56. My Legions of Terror will be trained in basic marksmanship. Any who
cannot learn to hit a man-sized target at 10 meters will be used for
target practice.
57. Before employing any captured artifacts or machinery, I will
carefully read the owner's manual.
58. I will never build a sentient computer smarter than I am.
59. My five-year-old child advisor will also be asked to decipher any
code I am thinking of using. If he breaks the code in under 30 seconds,
it will not be used. Note: this system also applies to passwords.
60. If it becomes necessary to escape, I will never stop to pose
dramatically and toss off a one-liner.
61. If my advisors ask, "Why are you risking everything on such a mad
scheme?", I will not proceed until I have an answer that satisfies them.
62. I will design fortress hallways with no alcoves or protruding
structural supports which intruders could use for cover in a firefight.
63. Bulk trash will be disposed of in incinerators, not compactors. And
they will be kept hot, with none of that nonsense about flames going
through accessible tunnels at predictable intervals.
64. I will see a competent psychiatrist and get cured of all extremely
unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits which could prove to be a
disadvantage.
65. If I must have computer systems with publicly available terminals,
the maps they display of my complex will have a room clearly marked as
the Main Control Room. That room will be the Execution Chamber. The
actual main
control room will be marked as Sewage Overflow Containment.
66. My security keypad will actually be a fingerprint scanner. Anyone
who watches someone press a sequence of buttons or dusts the pad for
fingerprints then subsequently tries to enter by repeating that sequence
will trigger the alarm system.
67. No matter how many shorts we have in the system, my guards will be
instructed to treat every surveillance camera malfunction as a
full-scale emergency.
68. I will spare someone who spared my life in the past. This is only
reasonable as it encourages others to do so. However, the offer is good
one time only. If they want me to spare them again, they'd better save
my life again.
69. All midwives will be banned from the realm. All babies will be
delivered at state-approved hospitals. Orphans will be placed in
foster-homes, not abandoned in the woods to be raised by creatures of
the wild.
70. When my guards split up to search for intruders, they will always
travel in groups of at least two. They will be trained so that if one of
them disappears mysteriously while on patrol, the other will immediately
initiate an alert and call for backup, instead of quizzically peering
around a corner.
71. If I decide to trust a lieutenant's loyalty and see if he/she should
be made a trusted lieutenant, I will have a crack squad of marksmen
standing by in case the answer is no.
72. If all the heroes are standing around a strange device and begin to
taunt me, I will pull out a conventional weapon instead of using my
unstoppable super weapon on them.
73. I will not agree to let the heroes go free if they win a rigged
contest, even though my advisors assure me it's impossible for me to win.
74. When I create a multimedia presentation of my plan designed so that
my five-year-old advisor can easily understand the details, I will not
label the disk "Project Overlord" and leave it lying on top of my desk.
75. I will instruct my Legions of Terror to attack the hero en mass,
instead of standing around waiting while members break off and attack
one or two at a time.
76. If the hero runs up to my roof, I will not run after him and
struggle with him in an attempt to push him over the edge. I will also
not engage him at the edge of a cliff. (In the middle of a rope bridge
over a river of molten lava is not even worth considering.)
77. If I have a fit of temporary insanity and decide to give the hero
the chance to reject a job as my trusted lieutenant, I will retain
enough sanity to wait until the current trusted lieutenant is out of
earshot.
78. I will not tell my Legions of Terror "And he must be taken alive!"
The command will be "And try to take him alive if it is reasonably
practical".
79. If my doomsday device happens to come with a reverse switch, as soon
as it has been employed it will be melted down and made into
limited-edition commemorative coins.
80. If my weakest troops fail to eliminate a hero, I will send out my
best troops instead of wasting time with progressively stronger ones as
he gets closer and closer to my fortress.
81. If I am fighting a hero atop a moving platform, have disarmed him,
and am about to finish him off and he glances behind me and drops flat,
I too will drop flat instead of quizzically turning around to find out
what he saw.
82. I will not shoot at any of my enemies if they are standing in front
of the crucial support beam to a heavy, dangerous, unbalanced structure.
83. If I'm eating dinner with the hero, put poison in his goblet, then
have to leave the table for any reason, I will order new drinks for both
of us instead of trying to decide whether or not to switch with him.
84. I will not have captives of one sex guarded by members of the other sex.
85. I will not use any plan in which the final step is horribly
complicated, e.g., "Align the 12 Stones of Power on the sacred altar
then activate the medallion on the moment of total eclipse." Instead it
will be more along the lines of "Push the button."
86. I will make sure that my doomsday device is up to code and properly
grounded.
87. My vats of hazardous chemicals will be covered when not in use.
Also, I will not construct walkways above them.
88. If a group of henchmen fail miserably at a task, I will not berate
them for incompetence then send the same group out to try the task again.
89. After I capture the hero's super weapon, I will not immediately
disband my legions and relax my guard because I believe whoever holds
the weapon is unstoppable. After all, the hero held the weapon and I
took it from him.
90. I will not design my Main Control Room so that every workstation is
facing away from the door.
91. I will not ignore the messenger that stumbles in exhausted and
obviously agitated until my personal grooming or current entertainment
is finished. It might actually be important.
92. If I ever talk to the hero on the phone, I will not taunt him.
Instead I will say that his dogged perseverance has given me new insight
on the futility of my evil ways and that if he leaves me alone for a few
months of quiet contemplation I will likely return to the path of
righteousness.
(Heroes are incredibly gullible in this regard.)
93. If I decide to hold a double execution of the hero and and underling
who failed me, I will see to it that the hero is scheduled to go first.
94. When arresting prisoners, my guards will not allow them to stop and
grab a useless trinket of purely sentimental value.
95. My dungeon will have its own qualified medical staff complete with
bodyguards. That way if a prisoner becomes sick and his cellmate tells
the guards it's an emergency, the guard will fetch a trauma team instead
of opening up the cell for a look.
96. My door mechanisms will be designed so that blasting the door on the
outside seals the door and blasting the control panel on the inside
opens the door, not vice versa.
97. My dungeon cells will be furnished with objects that retain
reflective surfaces or anything that can be unraveled.
98. If an attractive young couple enters my realm, I will carefully
monitor their activities. If I find they are happy and affectionate, I
will ignore them. However if circumstances have forced them together
against their will and they spend all their time bickering and
criticizing each other except during the intermittent occasions when
they are saving each other's lives at which point there are hints of
sexual tension, I will immediately order their execution.
99. Any data file of crucial importance will be padded to 1.45 Mb in size.
100. When the rebel leader challenges me to fight one-on-one and asks,
"Or are you afraid without your armies to back you up?" My reply will
be, "No, just sensible."
101. I will not order my trusted lieutenant to kill the infant who is
destined to overthrow me--I'll do it myself.
102. I will not waste time making my enemy's death look like an
accident--I'm not accountable to anyone and my other enemies wouldn't
believe it.
103. I will make it clear that I do know the meaning of the word
"mercy"; I simply choose not to show them any.
104. My undercover agents will not have tattoos identifying them as
members of my organization, not will they be required to wear military
boots or adhere to any dress codes.
105. I will design all doomsday machines myself. If I must hire a mad
scientist to assist me, I will make sure that he is sufficiently twisted
to never regret his evil ways and seek to undo the damage he's caused.
106. If my supreme command center comes under attack, I will immediately
flee to safety in my prepared escape pod and direct the defenses from
there. I will not wait until the troops break into my inner sanctum to
attempt this.
107. Even though I don't really care because I plan on living forever, I
will hire engineers who are able to build me a fortress sturdy enough
that, if I am slain, it won't tumble to the ground for no good
structural reason.
108. Any and all magic and/or technology that can miraculously resurrect
a secondary character who has given up his/her life through
self-sacrifice will be outlawed and destroyed.
109. I will see to it that plucky young lads/lasses in strange clothes
and with the accent of an outlander shall REGULARLY climb some monument
in the main square of my capital and denounce me, claim to know the
secret of my power, rally the masses to rebellion, etc. That way, the
citizens will be jaded in case the real thing ever comes along.
110. I will not employ devious schemes that involve the hero's party
getting into my inner sanctum before the trap is sprung.
111. I will offer oracles the choice of working exclusively for me or
being executed.
112. I will not rely on "totally reliable" spells that can be
neutralized by relatively inconspicuous talisman.
113. I will make the main entrance to my fortress standard-sized. While
elaborate 60-foot high double-doors definitely impress the masses, they
are hard to close quickly in an emergency.
114. I will never accept a challenge from the hero.
115. I will not engage an enemy single-handedly until all my soldiers
are dead.
116. If I capture the hero's starship, I will keep it in the landing bay
with the ramp down, only a few token guards on duty and a ton of
explosives set to go off as soon as it clears the blast range.
117. Finally, to keep my subjects permanently locked in a mindless
trance, I will provide each of them with free unlimited Internet access.

[Rich S.]

"nafod40" > wrote in message
...
> You'll need this information as well...
>
> Advice That Every Evil Overlord Should Heed. . .

(Snip of excellent advice)

These are all good points, but I was unable to find anything which addressed
the following situations:

1. A Deputy Overlord who has "close ties" to an oil company and directs
contracts to them leading to exploitation of conquered territories.
2. Restricting the freedom of my subjects to prevent them from removing me
from power by crashing their experimental aircraft into my armored personnel
carriers.
3. Having my evil Minister of Justice set up spy networks to thwart
incipient plots against me.

and finally. . .

4. Defusing the threat to my Overlordship from the Ugly Horse-faced Senator
by causing his more liberal minions to support an insidious Greener who has
no chance of unseating me. ;^}

Rich "BWAHAHAHAHAHA" S.

[pacplyer]

nafod40,

So, now we know you were in upper-level management at Microsoft! You
took notes watching master Gates in action. What would it take to
pull you over to the hacker Apple side?

Money? Power?

I can get those for you!!!!


pac "evil underdog" plyer






nafod40 > wrote in message >...
> Ralf Dieholt wrote:
> > Because I´m an evil megalomaniac and I will destroy all cities in the
> > world with atom bombs.
> >
> > What do I need for a good Stealth bomber ?
>
> Sharks. With laser beams on their heads.
>
> You'll need this information as well...
>
> Advice That Every Evil Overlord Should Heed
> Being an Evil Overlord seems to be a good career choice. It pays well,
> there are all sorts of perks, and you can set your own hours. However
> every Evil Overlord I've read about in books or seen in movies
> invariably gets overthrown or destroyed in the end. I've noticed that no
> matter whether they are barbarian lords, deranged wizards, mad
> scientists or alien invaders, they always seem to make the same basic
> mistakes every single time. With that in mind, allow me to present:
>
> The Top 117 Things I'd Do/Don't Do If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord:
> 1. My Legions of Terror will have helmets of clear Plexiglas, not
> face-concealing ones.
> 2. My ventilation ducts will be too small to crawl through.
> 3. My noble half-brother whose throne I usurped will be killed not kept
> anonymously imprisoned in a forgotten cell of my dungeon.
> 4. Shooting is not too good for my enemies.
> 5. The artifact, which is the one source of my power, will not be kept
> on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the
> Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies
> to the object which is my one weakness.
> 6. I will not gloat over my enemy's predicament before killing them.
> 7. When I've captured my adversary and he says, "Look, before you kill
> me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?" I'll say, "No,"
> and shoot him. No, on second thought I'll shoot him then say "No".
> 8. After I kidnap the beautiful princess, we will be married immediately
> in a quiet civil ceremony, not a lavish spectacle in three weeks' time
> during which the final phase of my plan will be carried out.
> 9. I will not include a self-destruct mechanism unless absolutely
> necessary. If it is necessary, it will not be a large red button labeled
> "Danger: Do Not Push." The big red button marked "Do Not Push" will
> instead trigger a spray of bullets on anyone stupid enough to disregard
> it. Similarly, the ON/OFF button will not clearly be labeled as such.
> 10. I will not interrogate my enemies in the inner sanctum--a small
> hotel well outside my borders will work just as well.
> 11. I will be secure in my superiority. Therefore, I will feel no need
> to prove it by leaving clues in the form of riddles or leaving weaker
> enemies alive to show they pose no threat.
> 12. One of my advisors will be an average five-year-old child. Any flaws
> in my plan he is able to spot will be corrected before implementation.
> 13. All slain enemies will be cremated, or at least have several rounds
> of ammunition emptied into them, not left for dead at the bottom of the
> cliff. The announcement of their deaths, as well as any accompanying
> celebration, will be deferred until after the aforementioned disposal.
> 14. The hero is not entitled to a last kiss, a last cigarette, or any
> other form of last request.
> 15. I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find
> that such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate
> when the counter reaches 117 and the hero is just putting his plan into
> operation.
> 16. I will never utter the sentence, "But before I kill you, there's
> just one thing I want to know."
> 17. When I employ people as advisors, I will occasionally listen to
> their advice.
> 18. I will not have a son. Although his laughably under-planned attempt
> to ursurp would easily fail, it would prove a fatal distraction at a
> crucial time.
> 19. I will not have a daughter. She would be as beautiful as she was
> evil, but one look at the hero's rugged countenance, and she'd betray
> her own father.
> 20. Despite its proven stress-relieving effect, I will not indulge in
> maniacal laughter. When so occupied, it's too easy to miss unexpected
> developments that a more attentive individual could adjust to accordingly.
> 21. I will hire a talented fashion designer to create original uniforms
> for my Legions of Terror, as opposed to some cheap knock-offs that make
> them look like Nazi storm troopers, Roman foot soldiers, or savage
> Mongol hordes. All were eventually defeated, and I want my troops to
> have a more positive mind-set.
> 22. No matter how tempted I am with the prospect of unlimited power, I
> will not consume any energy field bigger than my head.
> 23. I will keep a special cache of low-tech weapons and train my troops
> in their use. That way--even if the heroes manage to neutralize my power
> generator and/or render the standard-issue energy weapons useless--my
> troops will not be overrun by a handful of savages armed with spears and
> rocks.
> 24. I will maintain a realistic assessment of my strengths and
> weaknesses. Even though this takes some of the fun out of the job, at
> least I will never utter the line, "No! this cannot be! I AM
> INVINCIBLE!" (After that, death is usually instantaneous).
> 25. No matter how well it would perform, I will never construct any sort
> of machinery which is completely indestructible except for one small and
> virtually inexcusable vulnerable spot.
> 26. No matter how attractive certain members of the rebellion are, there
> is probably someone just as attractive who is not desperate to kill me.
> Therefore, I will think twice before ordering a prisoner sent to my
> bedchamber.
> 27. I will never build only one of anything important. All-important
> systems will have redundant control panels and power supplies. For the
> same reason, I will always carry at least two fully loaded weapons at
> all times.
> 28. My pet monster will be kept in a secure cage from which it cannot
> escape and into which I could not accidentally stumble.
> 29. I will dress in bright and cheery colors, and so throw my enemies
> into confusion.
> 30. All bumbling conjurers, clumsy squires, no-talent bards and cowardly
> thieves in the land will be preemptively put to death. My foes will
> surely give up and abandon their quest if they have no source of comic
> relief.
> 31. All naive, busty tavern wenches in the realm will be replaced with
> surly, world-weary waitresses who will provide no unexpected
> reinforcement and/or romantic subplot for the hero or his sidekick.
> 32. I will not fly into a rage and kill a messenger who brings me bad
> news, just to illustrate how evil I truly am. Good messengers are hard
> to come by.
> 33. I won't require high-ranking female members of my organization to
> wear a stainless-steel bustier. Morale is better with a more casual
> dress code.
> Similarly, outfits made entirely from black leather will be reserved for
> formal occasions.
> 34. I will not turn into a snake. It never helps.
> 35. I will not grow a goatee. In the old days they made you look
> diabolic. Now they just make you look like a disaffected member of
> Generation X.
> 36. I will not imprison members of the same party in the same cellblock,
> let alone the same cell. If they are important prisoners, I will keep
> the only key to the cell door on my person instead of handing out copies
> to every bottom-rung guard in the prison.
> 37. If my trusted lieutenant tells me my Legions of Terror are losing a
> battle, I will believe him. After all, he's my trusted lieutenant.
> 38. If an enemy I have just killed has a younger sibling or offspring
> anywhere, I will find them and have them killed immediately, instead of
> waiting for them to grow up harboring feelings of vengeance towards me
> in my old age.
> 39. If I absolutely must ride into battle, I will certainly not ride at
> the forefront of my Legions of Terror, nor will I seek out my opposite
> number in his army.
> 40. I will be neither chivalrous nor sporting. If I have an unstoppable
> super weapon, I will use it as early and as often as possible instead of
> keeping it in reserve.
> 41. Once my power is secure, I will destroy all those pesky time-travel
> devices.
> 42. Whenever I capture the hero, I will also make sure I get his dog,
> monkey, ferret, or whatever sickeningly cute little animal capable of
> untying ropes and filching keys happens to follow him around.
> 43. I will maintain a healthy amount of skepticism when I capture the
> beautiful rebel and she claims she is attracted to my power and good
> looks and will gladly betray her companions if I just let her in on my
> plans.
> 44. I will only employ bounty hunters who work for money. Those who work
> for the pleasure of the hunt tend to do dumb things like even the odds
> to give the other guy a sporting chance.
> 45. I will make sure I have a clear understanding of who is responsible
> for what in my organization. For example, if my general screws up, I
> will not point my weapon at him, say "And here is the price for
> failure", then suddenly turn and kill some random underling.
> 46. If an advisor says to me, "My liege, he is but one man. What can one
> man possibly do?", I will reply, "This", and kill the advisor.
> 47. If I learn that a callow youth has begun a quest to destroy me, I
> will slay him while he is still a callow youth instead of waiting for
> him to mature.
> 48. I will treat any beast which I control through magic or technology
> with respect and kindness. Thus if the control is ever broken, it will
> not immediately come after me for revenge.
> 49. If I learn the whereabouts of the one item which can destroy me, I
> will not send all my troops out to seize it. Instead I will send them
> out to seize something else and quietly put a Want-Ad in the local paper.
> 50. My main computers will have their own special operating system that
> will be completely incompatible with standard IBM and Microsoft or Mac
> PowerBooks.
> 51. If one of my dungeon guards begins expressing concern over the
> conditions in the beautiful princess's cell, I will immediately transfer
> him to a less people-oriented position.
> 52. I will hire a team of board-certified architects and surveyors to
> examine my castle and inform me of any secret passages and abandoned
> tunnels that I might not know about.
> 53. If the beautiful princess that I capture says, "I'll never marry
> you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!!", I will say "Oh well" and kill her.
> 54. I will not strike a bargain with a demonic being then attempt to
> double-cross it simply because I feel like being contrary.
> 55. The deformed mutants and oddball psychotics will have their place in
> my Legions of Terror. However before I send them out on important covert
> missions that require tact and subtlety, I will first see if there is
> anyone else equally qualified who would attract less attention.
> 56. My Legions of Terror will be trained in basic marksmanship. Any who
> cannot learn to hit a man-sized target at 10 meters will be used for
> target practice.
> 57. Before employing any captured artifacts or machinery, I will
> carefully read the owner's manual.
> 58. I will never build a sentient computer smarter than I am.
> 59. My five-year-old child advisor will also be asked to decipher any
> code I am thinking of using. If he breaks the code in under 30 seconds,
> it will not be used. Note: this system also applies to passwords.
> 60. If it becomes necessary to escape, I will never stop to pose
> dramatically and toss off a one-liner.
> 61. If my advisors ask, "Why are you risking everything on such a mad
> scheme?", I will not proceed until I have an answer that satisfies them.
> 62. I will design fortress hallways with no alcoves or protruding
> structural supports which intruders could use for cover in a firefight.
> 63. Bulk trash will be disposed of in incinerators, not compactors. And
> they will be kept hot, with none of that nonsense about flames going
> through accessible tunnels at predictable intervals.
> 64. I will see a competent psychiatrist and get cured of all extremely
> unusual phobias and bizarre compulsive habits which could prove to be a
> disadvantage.
> 65. If I must have computer systems with publicly available terminals,
> the maps they display of my complex will have a room clearly marked as
> the Main Control Room. That room will be the Execution Chamber. The
> actual main
> control room will be marked as Sewage Overflow Containment.
> 66. My security keypad will actually be a fingerprint scanner. Anyone
> who watches someone press a sequence of buttons or dusts the pad for
> fingerprints then subsequently tries to enter by repeating that sequence
> will trigger the alarm system.
> 67. No matter how many shorts we have in the system, my guards will be
> instructed to treat every surveillance camera malfunction as a
> full-scale emergency.
> 68. I will spare someone who spared my life in the past. This is only
> reasonable as it encourages others to do so. However, the offer is good
> one time only. If they want me to spare them again, they'd better save
> my life again.
> 69. All midwives will be banned from the realm. All babies will be
> delivered at state-approved hospitals. Orphans will be placed in
> foster-homes, not abandoned in the woods to be raised by creatures of
> the wild.
> 70. When my guards split up to search for intruders, they will always
> travel in groups of at least two. They will be trained so that if one of
> them disappears mysteriously while on patrol, the other will immediately
> initiate an alert and call for backup, instead of quizzically peering
> around a corner.
> 71. If I decide to trust a lieutenant's loyalty and see if he/she should
> be made a trusted lieutenant, I will have a crack squad of marksmen
> standing by in case the answer is no.
> 72. If all the heroes are standing around a strange device and begin to
> taunt me, I will pull out a conventional weapon instead of using my
> unstoppable super weapon on them.
> 73. I will not agree to let the heroes go free if they win a rigged
> contest, even though my advisors assure me it's impossible for me to win.
> 74. When I create a multimedia presentation of my plan designed so that
> my five-year-old advisor can easily understand the details, I will not
> label the disk "Project Overlord" and leave it lying on top of my desk.
> 75. I will instruct my Legions of Terror to attack the hero en mass,
> instead of standing around waiting while members break off and attack
> one or two at a time.
> 76. If the hero runs up to my roof, I will not run after him and
> struggle with him in an attempt to push him over the edge. I will also
> not engage him at the edge of a cliff. (In the middle of a rope bridge
> over a river of molten lava is not even worth considering.)
> 77. If I have a fit of temporary insanity and decide to give the hero
> the chance to reject a job as my trusted lieutenant, I will retain
> enough sanity to wait until the current trusted lieutenant is out of
> earshot.
> 78. I will not tell my Legions of Terror "And he must be taken alive!"
> The command will be "And try to take him alive if it is reasonably
> practical".
> 79. If my doomsday device happens to come with a reverse switch, as soon
> as it has been employed it will be melted down and made into
> limited-edition commemorative coins.
> 80. If my weakest troops fail to eliminate a hero, I will send out my
> best troops instead of wasting time with progressively stronger ones as
> he gets closer and closer to my fortress.
> 81. If I am fighting a hero atop a moving platform, have disarmed him,
> and am about to finish him off and he glances behind me and drops flat,
> I too will drop flat instead of quizzically turning around to find out
> what he saw.
> 82. I will not shoot at any of my enemies if they are standing in front
> of the crucial support beam to a heavy, dangerous, unbalanced structure.
> 83. If I'm eating dinner with the hero, put poison in his goblet, then
> have to leave the table for any reason, I will order new drinks for both
> of us instead of trying to decide whether or not to switch with him.
> 84. I will not have captives of one sex guarded by members of the other sex.
> 85. I will not use any plan in which the final step is horribly
> complicated, e.g., "Align the 12 Stones of Power on the sacred altar
> then activate the medallion on the moment of total eclipse." Instead it
> will be more along the lines of "Push the button."
> 86. I will make sure that my doomsday device is up to code and properly
> grounded.
> 87. My vats of hazardous chemicals will be covered when not in use.
> Also, I will not construct walkways above them.
> 88. If a group of henchmen fail miserably at a task, I will not berate
> them for incompetence then send the same group out to try the task again.
> 89. After I capture the hero's super weapon, I will not immediately
> disband my legions and relax my guard because I believe whoever holds
> the weapon is unstoppable. After all, the hero held the weapon and I
> took it from him.
> 90. I will not design my Main Control Room so that every workstation is
> facing away from the door.
> 91. I will not ignore the messenger that stumbles in exhausted and
> obviously agitated until my personal grooming or current entertainment
> is finished. It might actually be important.
> 92. If I ever talk to the hero on the phone, I will not taunt him.
> Instead I will say that his dogged perseverance has given me new insight
> on the futility of my evil ways and that if he leaves me alone for a few
> months of quiet contemplation I will likely return to the path of
> righteousness.
> (Heroes are incredibly gullible in this regard.)
> 93. If I decide to hold a double execution of the hero and and underling
> who failed me, I will see to it that the hero is scheduled to go first.
> 94. When arresting prisoners, my guards will not allow them to stop and
> grab a useless trinket of purely sentimental value.
> 95. My dungeon will have its own qualified medical staff complete with
> bodyguards. That way if a prisoner becomes sick and his cellmate tells
> the guards it's an emergency, the guard will fetch a trauma team instead
> of opening up the cell for a look.
> 96. My door mechanisms will be designed so that blasting the door on the
> outside seals the door and blasting the control panel on the inside
> opens the door, not vice versa.
> 97. My dungeon cells will be furnished with objects that retain
> reflective surfaces or anything that can be unraveled.
> 98. If an attractive young couple enters my realm, I will carefully
> monitor their activities. If I find they are happy and affectionate, I
> will ignore them. However if circumstances have forced them together
> against their will and they spend all their time bickering and
> criticizing each other except during the intermittent occasions when
> they are saving each other's lives at which point there are hints of
> sexual tension, I will immediately order their execution.
> 99. Any data file of crucial importance will be padded to 1.45 Mb in size.
> 100. When the rebel leader challenges me to fight one-on-one and asks,
> "Or are you afraid without your armies to back you up?" My reply will
> be, "No, just sensible."
> 101. I will not order my trusted lieutenant to kill the infant who is
> destined to overthrow me--I'll do it myself.
> 102. I will not waste time making my enemy's death look like an
> accident--I'm not accountable to anyone and my other enemies wouldn't
> believe it.
> 103. I will make it clear that I do know the meaning of the word
> "mercy"; I simply choose not to show them any.
> 104. My undercover agents will not have tattoos identifying them as
> members of my organization, not will they be required to wear military
> boots or adhere to any dress codes.
> 105. I will design all doomsday machines myself. If I must hire a mad
> scientist to assist me, I will make sure that he is sufficiently twisted
> to never regret his evil ways and seek to undo the damage he's caused.
> 106. If my supreme command center comes under attack, I will immediately
> flee to safety in my prepared escape pod and direct the defenses from
> there. I will not wait until the troops break into my inner sanctum to
> attempt this.
> 107. Even though I don't really care because I plan on living forever, I
> will hire engineers who are able to build me a fortress sturdy enough
> that, if I am slain, it won't tumble to the ground for no good
> structural reason.
> 108. Any and all magic and/or technology that can miraculously resurrect
> a secondary character who has given up his/her life through
> self-sacrifice will be outlawed and destroyed.
> 109. I will see to it that plucky young lads/lasses in strange clothes
> and with the accent of an outlander shall REGULARLY climb some monument
> in the main square of my capital and denounce me, claim to know the
> secret of my power, rally the masses to rebellion, etc. That way, the
> citizens will be jaded in case the real thing ever comes along.
> 110. I will not employ devious schemes that involve the hero's party
> getting into my inner sanctum before the trap is sprung.
> 111. I will offer oracles the choice of working exclusively for me or
> being executed.
> 112. I will not rely on "totally reliable" spells that can be
> neutralized by relatively inconspicuous talisman.
> 113. I will make the main entrance to my fortress standard-sized. While
> elaborate 60-foot high double-doors definitely impress the masses, they
> are hard to close quickly in an emergency.
> 114. I will never accept a challenge from the hero.
> 115. I will not engage an enemy single-handedly until all my soldiers
> are dead.
> 116. If I capture the hero's starship, I will keep it in the landing bay
> with the ramp down, only a few token guards on duty and a ton of
> explosives set to go off as soon as it clears the blast range.
> 117. Finally, to keep my subjects permanently locked in a mindless
> trance, I will provide each of them with free unlimited Internet access.

[BernadetteTS]

In article >,
nafod40 > wrote:

> Ralf Dieholt wrote:
> > Because I´m an evil megalomaniac and I will destroy all cities in the
> > world with atom bombs.
> >
> > What do I need for a good Stealth bomber ?
>
Fill a blender half full of paint. Turn it on liquify setting and add
tape from a video cassette until it is ground and blended into a paint
paste. Paint any airplane with this and it is invisible to radar. The
magnetic absorbing qualities of the ground up tape absorbs the radar
waves. Don't forget the 1N34A diode rectified ground wire. You must use
a wooden prop or the electrical field of the spinning prop will
generate Tesla impulses.

It's also a good idea to wear your aluminum foil helmet so you can't be
mind controlled while flying it.

Bernadette

[Ernest Christley]

Ralf Dieholt wrote:
> Because I´m an evil megalomaniac and I will destroy all cities in the
> world with atom bombs.
>
> What do I need for a good Stealth bomber ?

A set of plans from John Dyke

--
http://www.ernest.isa-geek.org/
"Ignorance is mankinds normal state,
alleviated by information and experience."
Veeduber

[Richard Riley]

On Tue, 24 Feb 2004 03:04:42 GMT, Ernest Christley
> wrote:

:Ralf Dieholt wrote:
:> Because I´m an evil megalomaniac and I will destroy all cities in the
:> world with atom bombs.
:>
:> What do I need for a good Stealth bomber ?
:
:A set of plans from John Dyke

Or a from Barnaby Wainfan, if he ever sells them.

[Dude]

If its got a prop, of any material, it ain't stealthy. Helicopters do nasty
things to some radars, and they can sometimes be hard to locate accurately.
The reason is the prop makes so much radar noise.



"JFLEISC" > wrote in message
...
> OK, I have a question on this subject. What about a fabric covered wood
plane?
> Would the "aluminized" paint for UV protection have the same radar
reflection
> as an aluminum airframe?
>
> Jim

[nafod40]

pacplyer wrote:
> nafod40,
>
> So, now we know you were in upper-level management at Microsoft! You
> took notes watching master Gates in action. What would it take to
> pull you over to the hacker Apple side?
>
> Money? Power?
>
> I can get those for you!!!!

B-r-r-r-ing me....a shrubbery.

[lifespeed]

BernadetteTS > wrote in message >...
> Fill a blender half full of paint. Turn it on liquify setting and add
> tape from a video cassette until it is ground and blended into a paint
> paste. Paint any airplane with this and it is invisible to radar. The
> magnetic absorbing qualities of the ground up tape absorbs the radar
> waves. Don't forget the 1N34A diode rectified ground wire. You must use
> a wooden prop or the electrical field of the spinning prop will
> generate Tesla impulses.
> Bernadette

What is the 1N34A diode for?

Lifespeed

[BernadetteTS]

In article >,
(lifespeed) wrote:

> What is the 1N34A diode for?
> Lifespeed

100 of them for $8.00 + $4 shipping on ebay;
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=2227588535

Bernadette

[nauga]

> What is the 1N34A diode for?

Keeps the flux capacitor from feeding back
and causing a rift in the space-time continuum.

Dave 'Reverend Jim' Hyde

[Ron Wanttaja]

On Tue, 24 Feb 2004 23:46:13 GMT, "nauga" > wrote:

>> What is the 1N34A diode for?
>
>Keeps the flux capacitor from feeding back
>and causing a rift in the space-time continuum.
>
>Dave 'Reverend Jim' Hyde


I prefer the oscillation overthruster system, myself....

Ron "Maltz! Jol ylchu'!" Wanttaja

[[email protected]]

nafod40 <
> Sharks. With laser beams on their heads.
>
> You'll need this information as well...
>
> Advice That Every Evil Overlord Should Heed
> Being an Evil Overlord seems to be a good career choice. It pays well,
> there are all sorts of perks, and you can set your own hours. However
> every Evil Overlord I've read about in books or seen in movies
> invariably gets overthrown or destroyed in the end. I've noticed that no
> matter whether they are barbarian lords, deranged wizards, mad
> scientists or alien invaders, they always seem to make the same basic
> mistakes every single time. With that in mind, allow me to present:
>
> The Top 117 Things I'd Do/Don't Do If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord:
> 1. My Legions of Terror will have helmets of clear Plexiglas, not
> face-concealing ones.
(snip)

Your advice on suriviving as an Evil Lord made my whole evening. It
was a terrific read, and obviously the product of much hard work on
your part!

Should I ever decide that I am through with the Light- I will make a
thorough reading of your caveats my first priority.

Again, Thanks
Christopher, the ferret-hearted

[Pete Schaefer]

Bad stealth design.

"John Ousterhout" >
wrote in message ...
> Or one of these... http://members.aol.com/slicklynne/facet.htm

[Mike Patterson]

On Thu, 26 Feb 2004 05:26:12 GMT, "Pete Schaefer"
> wrote:

>Bad stealth design.
>

Cool, always glad to hear from an expert, what does your look like?
:-)


>"John Ousterhout" >
>wrote in message ...
>> Or one of these... http://members.aol.com/slicklynne/facet.htm
>

Mike Patterson
Please remove the spamtrap to email me.

[Pete Schaefer]

I find it really funny that you would use that kind of sarcasm. If you
really want to know about stealth design, you need to get a job at my
company and get a clearance. I'm an engineer in a company you might know
about that's located in Palmdale, CA. We've demonstrated just a little bit
of success on this discussion topic!

"Mike Patterson" > wrote in message
...
> On Thu, 26 Feb 2004 05:26:12 GMT, "Pete Schaefer"
> > wrote:
> >Bad stealth design.
> Cool, always glad to hear from an expert, what does your look like?

[Mike Patterson]

On Thu, 26 Feb 2004 15:28:04 GMT, "Pete Schaefer"
> wrote:

>I find it really funny that you would use that kind of sarcasm. If you
>really want to know about stealth design, you need to get a job at my
>company and get a clearance. I'm an engineer in a company you might know
>about that's located in Palmdale, CA. We've demonstrated just a little bit
>of success on this discussion topic!
>
>"Mike Patterson" > wrote in message
...
>> On Thu, 26 Feb 2004 05:26:12 GMT, "Pete Schaefer"
>> > wrote:
>> >Bad stealth design.
>> Cool, always glad to hear from an expert, what does your look like?
>

Great! I thought you were kidding, so was I. That homebuilt is
obviously not designed for stealth, so I thought you were making a
funny.

No offense meant, Pete. Pax!

....and can we see pics of yours? :-)

Mike Patterson
Please remove the spamtrap to email me.

[David O]

wrote:

>Your advice on suriviving as an Evil Lord made my whole evening. It
>was a terrific read, and obviously the product of much hard work on
>your part!

Yeah, hard work indeed. As hard as copy/paste. "Nofod" authored
neither the list nor the preamble that he posted. Presenting the
preamble (written in first person) and the list as he did gives the
false impression that he is the author -- just another of my pet
peeves regarding usenet posts. The copyrighted "Overlord" list ends
at 100 but various amended lists, some with as many as 200 entries,
are floating around the net. "Nofod" is perhaps responsible for the
last (and somewhat banal) entry in "his" list.

http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html

David "truth in advertising" O -- http://www.AirplaneZone.com

[Big John]

Ralf

USAF is talking about putting ten F-117A's in bone yard to save
money. If you can get one, you won't have to reinvent the wheel.

Big John


On 22 Feb 2004 00:13:10 -0800, (Ralf Dieholt)
wrote:

>Because I´m an evil megalomaniac and I will destroy all cities in the
>world with atom bombs.
>
>What do I need for a good Stealth bomber ?

[StellaStar]

>33. I won't require high-ranking female members of my organization to
>wear a stainless-steel bustier. Morale is better with a more casual
>dress code.

Dang. I'd been keeping my chrome lingerie all buffed up to a high shine.
Appearance is important when you're interviewing for a part-time job, and I'd
been hoping to pick up some hours on weekends snapping at the domestic staff:
"You heard ze mahstah! Take zem to de dungeons!"

-Stella-

(imagining the horses whinnying as if they'd heard someone say "Frau Blucher")

[Pete Schaefer]

"Mike Patterson" > wrote in message
...
> ...and can we see pics of yours? :-)

Uhhh...if you can see it, then I got a major problem. But here's one of mine
I can talk about:
http://www.nasm.si.edu/museum/udvarhazy/construction/images/09-30-03_003.jpg.
I designed the yaw axis control laws from conversion to STOVL to hover. As
far as the rest of my stuff......maybe I'll be able to tell my kid about it
all some day.

Actually, I've been lurking on this group for a bit. I'm seriously
considering building an RV-8A and fitting it with a DeltaHawk 2-stroke
diesel. Vrooom! I'm tired of working on everyone elses airplanes. Time for
one of my own.

[Pete Schaefer]

Yup. All he needs is a fleet of KC-10's and he'll have global reach.

"Big John" > wrote in message
...
> USAF is talking about putting ten F-117A's in bone yard to save
> money. If you can get one, you won't have to reinvent the wheel.

[pacplyer]

David O > wrote
> Yeah, hard work indeed. As hard as copy/paste. "Nofod" authored
> neither the list nor the preamble that he posted. Presenting the
> preamble (written in first person) and the list as he did gives the
> false impression that he is the author -- just another of my pet
> peeves regarding usenet posts. The copyrighted "Overlord" list ends
> at 100 but various amended lists, some with as many as 200 entries,
> are floating around the net. "Nofod" is perhaps responsible for the
> last (and somewhat banal) entry in "his" list.
>
> http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html
>
> David "truth in advertising" O -- http://www.AirplaneZone.com


Robinplyer:
"Holy Hand Grenade Mr. O! You've stumbled on to Nafod's true
identity!"

Bat-O:
Unless I miss my hunch, Only the Master bates (I mean Gates) would be
so bold as to copy the Macintosh Desktop and slap the Windows name on
it, claiming it as his own. Same thing with IE. We are in the
billion dollar shadow of true evil genius here. Thank Gothom a
caped-crusader like me has spotted the plagiarism and decided to match
wits with him. I wonder who's going to win?

Or…

This whole thing is a tongue-in-cheek thread where all posters have
borrowed themes from popular sci-fi culture.

Which do you suppose is more likely? ;-) ;-) ;-)

My Bat instincts just realized something else: no where in that first
cryptic message by Nafod does he say "here's a story I wrote." And he
didn't sign his name at the end of it...

I would be willing to bet my bat boots though, that our arch villain
"No-fear" is at this very moment planning his revenge and plotting a
clever way to destroy all BD-5 engines so that no one can afford to
run reconnaissance flights over his secret island...

Robinplyer: "Holy Mackerel Bat-O! I'm glued to this computer
screen... I can't break away… Bat-O? Bat-O?"

BANNNAANNAANANANNANAAANNANNANA

Will the seriousness of RAH prevent anyone from having a good time?
Will the spelling trolls and nit-pick forces of the world grab control
of the net?
Will Bat-O ever develop a sense of humor?

Tune in next week.
Same bat newsgroup...
Same bat posters...

[Mike Patterson]

On Fri, 27 Feb 2004 05:38:03 GMT, "Pete Schaefer"
> wrote:

>"Mike Patterson" > wrote in message
...
>> ...and can we see pics of yours? :-)
>
>Uhhh...if you can see it, then I got a major problem. But here's one of mine
>I can talk about:
>http://www.nasm.si.edu/museum/udvarhazy/construction/images/09-30-03_003.jpg.
>I designed the yaw axis control laws from conversion to STOVL to hover. As
>far as the rest of my stuff......maybe I'll be able to tell my kid about it
>all some day.
>
>Actually, I've been lurking on this group for a bit. I'm seriously
>considering building an RV-8A and fitting it with a DeltaHawk 2-stroke
>diesel. Vrooom! I'm tired of working on everyone elses airplanes. Time for
>one of my own.
>

Good Stuff! Keep us posted on the RV-8A. Most everyone here likes to
see what others are flying/working on.

I have somewhat more mundane aspirations myself, saving my pennies for
one of Chuck Sluz%$&$#*('s Hawks.

Suffered a setback in the savings plan when I hit 13 months of
unemployment, but hoping to get back on track soon now that I am again
gainfully employed.


Mike Patterson
Please remove the spamtrap to email me.

[Skyking]

(Ralf Dieholt) wrote in message >...
> Because I´m an evil megalomaniac and I will destroy all cities in the
> world with atom bombs.
>
> What do I need for a good Stealth bomber ?

You sound like a BORED Troll to me.

Skyking

[Ron Wanttaja]

On 27 Feb 2004 06:30:26 -0800, (Skyking) wrote:

(Ralf Dieholt) wrote in message >...
>> Because I´m an evil megalomaniac and I will destroy all cities in the
>> world with atom bombs.
>>
>> What do I need for a good Stealth bomber ?
>
>You sound like a BORED Troll to me.

That's the worst KIND of evil megalomaniac.... :-)

Ron Wanttaja

[David O]

(pacplyer) wrote:

<snip>

>Which do you suppose is more likely?

Neither, as both were inventions on your part.

>My Bat instincts just realized something else: no where in that first
>cryptic message by Nafod does he say "here's a story I wrote." And he
>didn't sign his name at the end of it...

It was presented as if he wrote it. The first-person preamble made it
seem especially so. Several respondents assumed he was the author. I
merely set the record straight. Your objection has no merit.

>Will the seriousness of RAH prevent anyone from having a good time?
>Will the spelling trolls and nit-pick forces of the world grab control
>of the net?
>Will Bat-O ever develop a sense of humor?

Will pacman ever have the guts to use his real name? Will "nafod"? I
doubt it. My full name and email address are on my website. My home
address and phone number are available to anyone who can use a
web-based whois. For the record, I think you are a ****ing idiot. I
have zero interest in your incessant blather and your inane attempts
to be oh-so-clever. If you want to take issue with me in person, I
expect to be at Oshkosh again this year.

David O -- http://www.AirplaneZone.com

[pacplyer]

David O > wrote <snip>
>
> It was presented as if he wrote it. The first-person preamble made it
> seem especially so. Several respondents assumed he was the author. I
> merely set the record straight. Your objection has no merit.
>
> >Will the seriousness of RAH prevent anyone from having a good time?
> >Will the spelling trolls and nit-pick forces of the world grab control
> >of the net?
> >Will Bat-O ever develop a sense of humor?
>
> Will pacman ever have the guts to use his real name? Will "nafod"? I
> doubt it. My full name and email address are on my website. My home
> address and phone number are available to anyone who can use a
> web-based whois. For the record, I think you are a ****ing idiot. I
> have zero interest in your incessant blather and your inane attempts
> to be oh-so-clever. If you want to take issue with me in person, I
> expect to be at Oshkosh again this year.
>
> David O -- http://www.AirplaneZone.com

Then explain to me Dickhead, why you're still reading my "blather."
Only a fool reads material that he considers un-clever. I think you
love reading me. Otherwise you'd have kill filed me a long time ago.

Please don't read me anymore David. I'll show you how to selectively
read if you can't figure out how to do it yourself. *Please filter
me.* I have no interest in being read by a dour little camera bug
that posts pictures of "haze layers" on his website. You have a very
different view of quality content then I do. You also seem to be
under the delusion that we are submitting formal essays for you to
proofread and grade. Only a dork would read this thread and assume
that Nafod is trying to rip off some obscure little website that you
found searching on Google. You admitted it yourself: variations of
that gag have been all over the net for years. Just like the
rocket-powered car story. I very much doubt that either of those
story-lines were copyrighted by the originating author. You are
what's wrong with usenet today. You have no tolerance for other
posters preferences and worse IMHO I don't think you're mentally
stable. Lastly, stay the hell away from me at Osh. I do not want to
meet you.

I think you should consider getting some "couch time."

pacplyer

[pacplyer]

David O > wimpered:
>
> Will pacman ever have the guts to use his real name? Will "nafod"? I
> doubt it. My full name and email address are on my website. My home
> address and phone number are available to anyone who can use a
> web-based whois.

Riddle me this: Who cares? You've never written anything
interesting.

> For the record, I think you are a ****ing idiot.

And I think I will become your personal troll everytime you try to
interfere with other people having a good time. Face it, you don't
belong in this thread. You don't have any personality! :^D LOL!

What a dick!

[David O]

(pacplyer) wrote:

>Then explain to me Dickhead, why you're still reading my "blather."
>Only a fool reads material that he considers un-clever.

I generally don't read your blather. I read your blather this time
because you posted it in direct response to my post. Did you not
expect me to read your blithering response? Do you have any clue at
all?

>I have no interest in being read by a dour little camera bug
>that posts pictures of "haze layers" on his website. You have a very
>different view of quality content then I do.

"The best Oshkosh coverage I've ever seen", is a frequent response to
my website. "Almost like being there", is another frequent comment.
That you think otherwise is neither here nor there. You are an idiot.

I find it quite telling that in your follow-up note (my, you ARE
bothered!) you promise to become my "personal troll". Talk about
mental issues! My God man, that is sick!

David O -- http://www.AirplaneZone.com

[pacplyer]

David O > wrote in message >...
> (pacplyer) wrote: <snip>
>
> "The best Oshkosh coverage I've ever seen", is a frequent response to
> my website. "Almost like being there", is another frequent comment.

Better coverage than the EAA website? Who said that? Jethro Clampet?
Gomer Pyle? ROTFOL! :^D You really are delusional. Get help.

> That you think otherwise is neither here nor there. You are an idiot.
<snip>

F.O.A.D. This thread was fun till you showed up. What a sour note you
are. Well this dueling banjos is not fun anymore. I'm out of here.

Asta La Vista, hillbilly

[Morgans]

"pacplyer" > wrote in message
om...
> David O > wrote in message
>...
> > (pacplyer) wrote: <snip>
> >
> > "The best Oshkosh coverage I've ever seen", is a frequent response to
> > my website. "Almost like being there", is another frequent comment.
>
> Better coverage than the EAA website? Who said that? Jethro Clampet?
> Gomer Pyle? ROTFOL! :^D You really are delusional. Get help.
>
> > That you think otherwise is neither here nor there. You are an idiot.
> <snip>
>
> F.O.A.D. This thread was fun till you showed up. What a sour note you
> are. Well this dueling banjos is not fun anymore. I'm out of here.
>
> Asta La Vista, hillbilly
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Your true colors are showing, Bill. Oh that's right you are not Bill. His
twin brother?
--
Jim in NC


---
Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.594 / Virus Database: 377 - Release Date: 2/24/2004

[Owe Rudbeck]

Hello David

This is a "voice" from the other side of the Atlantic O.
You are 100% right about the copywright issue, period
and Your pictures from O. and the way You present
them and other pictures, are in my eyes, very good.
Please go on and do not care about what the idiot
(under(fr8)dog pacplyer has to "say").

A nice day to You sir says Owe

"David O" > skrev i meddelandet
...
>
> (pacplyer) wrote:
>
> <snip>
>
> >Which do you suppose is more likely?
>
> Neither, as both were inventions on your part.
>
> >My Bat instincts just realized something else: no where in that first
> >cryptic message by Nafod does he say "here's a story I wrote." And he
> >didn't sign his name at the end of it...
>
> It was presented as if he wrote it. The first-person preamble made it
> seem especially so. Several respondents assumed he was the author. I
> merely set the record straight. Your objection has no merit.
>
> >Will the seriousness of RAH prevent anyone from having a good time?
> >Will the spelling trolls and nit-pick forces of the world grab control
> >of the net?
> >Will Bat-O ever develop a sense of humor?
>
> Will pacman ever have the guts to use his real name? Will "nafod"? I
> doubt it. My full name and email address are on my website. My home
> address and phone number are available to anyone who can use a
> web-based whois. For the record, I think you are a ****ing idiot. I
> have zero interest in your incessant blather and your inane attempts
> to be oh-so-clever. If you want to take issue with me in person, I
> expect to be at Oshkosh again this year.
>
> David O -- http://www.AirplaneZone.com
>
>

[David O]

"Owe Rudbeck" > wrote:

>Hello David

>This is a "voice" from the other side of the Atlantic O.
>You are 100% right about the copywright issue, period
>and Your pictures from O. and the way You present
>them and other pictures, are in my eyes, very good.
>Please go on and do not care about what the idiot
>(under(fr8)dog pacplyer has to "say").
>
>A nice day to You sir says Owe


Thanks for the kind words, Owe. One of your countrymen, from Orebro,
was quite helpful in vetting out occasional errors in the scrapbook.
It's always nice to hear from across the pond. I hope you have a nice
day as well. :)

David O -- http://www.AirplaneZone.com

[nafod40]

David O wrote:
>
> It was presented as if he wrote it. The first-person preamble made it
> seem especially so. Several respondents assumed he was the author. I
> merely set the record straight. Your objection has no merit.
>
<snip>
>
>
> Will pacman ever have the guts to use his real name? Will "nafod"? I
> doubt it.

David, somewhere on your resume must be the words "Morale Supression
Officer". I've watched that Evil Overlord thing bounce around for a
number of years now, and just didn't really consider all of the legal
consequences or consult with my constitutional lawyers, etc., prior to
being the one-hundred-millionth person to forward it on, albeit via a
newsgroup rather than an email chain letter, which is how I normally
receive it on a monthly basis. I should have gave attribution.

As for anonymity, it's not about guts. I just got tired of receiving
SWEN (news spelled backwards) viruses, viagra ads, cable box ads, and
"Hi I'm Suzy, have you seen me lately"'s in my inbox, and having my real
google-able name get sucked into child-like ****ing matches on an
extremely public forum. But a quick bit of past post googling will
reveal my true identity. Hint: I'm not The Dark Overlord.

[nauga]

nafod40 wrote:

> ..."Morale Supression Officer".

I like that. I don't suppose it's copyrighted? <g>

> But a quick bit of past post googling will
> reveal my true identity. Hint: I'm not The Dark Overlord.

Could you have cashed my check if I made it out to NAFOD?
I see a Skybolt in my future :-)

Dave 'so little time...' Hyde

[David O]

nafod40 > wrote:

>David, somewhere on your resume must be the words "Morale Supression
>Officer".

If simply pointing out the truth spoils anyone's "morale" or "fun",
then so be it. The fact remains that several people thought you wrote
the list. I gave you a few days to set the record straight. When you
didn't, I did. Simple as that.

>I've watched that Evil Overlord thing bounce around for a
>number of years now, and just didn't really consider all of the legal
>consequences or consult with my constitutional lawyers, etc., prior to
>being the one-hundred-millionth person to forward it on, albeit via a
>newsgroup rather than an email chain letter, which is how I normally
>receive it on a monthly basis. I should have gave attribution.

Indeed you should have. For the record, my original post is copied
below, verbatim, in all its alleged "morale suppressing" and "fun
busting" glory.

David "party pooper" O -- http://www.AirplaneZone.com

---------------------------


Original post:

Yeah, hard work indeed. As hard as copy/paste. "Nofod" authored
neither the list nor the preamble that he posted. Presenting the
preamble (written in first person) and the list as he did gives the
false impression that he is the author -- just another of my pet
peeves regarding usenet posts. The copyrighted "Overlord" list ends
at 100 but various amended lists, some with as many as 200 entries,
are floating around the net. "Nofod" is perhaps responsible for the
last (and somewhat banal) entry in "his" list.

http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html

David "truth in advertising" O -- http://www.AirplaneZone.com

[Nafod40]

"nauga" wrote ...
> nafod40 wrote:
>
> > ..."Morale Supression Officer".
>
> I like that. I don't suppose it's copyrighted? <g>
>
> > But a quick bit of past post googling will
> > reveal my true identity. Hint: I'm not The Dark Overlord.
>
> Could you have cashed my check if I made it out to NAFOD?
> I see a Skybolt in my future :-)

Reminds me of the joke about the cheapskate who changed his name to
"AGD-7077" so he could have personalized license plates.

For that much money, I'd have changed my name (again).

> Dave 'so little time...' Hyde
>

Mike "I vant to be left alone" Y.

[Pete Schaefer]

> wrote in message ...
> And the guy that built FMX4 is a senior scientist with a company you might
know
> from El Segundo, that does some pretty good stealth too. Like Have Blue,

Have Blue was a 1970's Lockheed airplane, not Northrop's. Before my time
anyway.

> F-23 (that had a lower RCS than F22)

An interesting claim. If you really knew anything about it, you'd know to
keep your mouth shut. Ergo..... Besides, aircraft are designed to
requirements. The F-22 met the requirements, so.....what's your point?

> How'd that tier3- project of yours turn out?

Wasn't mine. Actually, that was a Boeing airframe design. I watched that
crash. I was employed at NASA Dryden at that time.

> Of course the FMX isn't a stealth vehicle, it wasn't designed to be one.
It's

Yeah, I got that, too.

So, beyond that last comment, what was your point?

[JAFO]

On Tue, 02 Mar 2004 03:53:03 GMT, "Pete Schaefer"
> wrote:

:
> wrote in message ...
:> And the guy that built FMX4 is a senior scientist with a company you might
:know
:> from El Segundo, that does some pretty good stealth too. Like Have Blue,
:
:Have Blue was a 1970's Lockheed airplane, not Northrop's. Before my time
:anyway.

He probably means Tacit Blue, the ugliest airplane to ever fly.

[nafod40]

David O wrote:
> nafod40 > wrote:
>
>
>>David, somewhere on your resume must be the words "Morale Supression
>>Officer".
>
>
> If simply pointing out the truth spoils anyone's "morale" or "fun",
> then so be it. The fact remains that several people thought you wrote
> the list. I gave you a few days to set the record straight.

I shall treasure your gift always, David.

Mike

[nauga]

JAFO wrote:

> He probably means Tacit Blue, the ugliest airplane to ever fly.

Aiiiyeee! An early attempt at 'visual stealth.' So ugly
you had to turn your head.

Dave 'barn doors and bathtubs' Hyde

[Pete Schaefer]

I thought that the Boeing X-32 was the ugliest. Oh, but wait: The X-32 had
sort of a happy face on it (big smiling inlet), so I guess I have to give it
a couple points for personality. "I'm a big fat happy airplane!"

"JAFO" > wrote in message
...
> He probably means Tacit Blue, the ugliest airplane to ever fly.

[Big John]

Pete

I thought for years the F-4 was thought to be the ugliest bird around?
Some still think that way, especially those who flew it. <G>

I saw the first flight of the F-4 at St Louis and sure wasn't
impressed with its looks.

Big John


On Wed, 03 Mar 2004 05:36:33 GMT, "Pete Schaefer"
> wrote:

>I thought that the Boeing X-32 was the ugliest. Oh, but wait: The X-32 had
>sort of a happy face on it (big smiling inlet), so I guess I have to give it
>a couple points for personality. "I'm a big fat happy airplane!"
>
>"JAFO" > wrote in message
...
>> He probably means Tacit Blue, the ugliest airplane to ever fly.
>

[Richard Riley]

On Mon, 01 Mar 2004 22:37:10 -0800, JAFO >
wrote:

:On Tue, 02 Mar 2004 03:53:03 GMT, "Pete Schaefer"
> wrote:
:
::
> wrote in message ...
::> And the guy that built FMX4 is a senior scientist with a company you might
::know
::> from El Segundo, that does some pretty good stealth too. Like Have Blue,
::
::Have Blue was a 1970's Lockheed airplane, not Northrop's. Before my time
::anyway.
:
:He probably means Tacit Blue, the ugliest airplane to ever fly.

Oh my God, my eyes!!. I thought nothing was worse than the m-15
Belphegor http://www.luftfahrtmuseum.com/htmi/ii/i006951.htm

[Pete Schaefer]

Oh my. That definitely ranks up there with the ugliest. A face that only a
mother could love..


"Richard Riley" > wrote in message
...
> Oh my God, my eyes!!. I thought nothing was worse than the m-15
> Belphegor http://www.luftfahrtmuseum.com/htmi/ii/i006951.htm

[Big John]

Pete

Talk about putting some KC-135's out to pasture also. He could get the
whole system 'off the shelf' (or off the dessert floor) <G>

Big John


On Fri, 27 Feb 2004 05:39:59 GMT, "Pete Schaefer"
> wrote:

>Yup. All he needs is a fleet of KC-10's and he'll have global reach.
>
>"Big John" > wrote in message
...
>> USAF is talking about putting ten F-117A's in bone yard to save
>> money. If you can get one, you won't have to reinvent the wheel.
>

[Big John]

Correction

Really didn't mean 'dessert', but I was hungary :o(

Big John

On Thu, 04 Mar 2004 12:46:07 -0600, Big John >
wrote:

>Pete
>
>Talk about putting some KC-135's out to pasture also. He could get the
>whole system 'off the shelf' (or off the dessert floor) <G>
>
>Big John
>
>
>On Fri, 27 Feb 2004 05:39:59 GMT, "Pete Schaefer"
> wrote:
>
>>Yup. All he needs is a fleet of KC-10's and he'll have global reach.
>>
>>"Big John" > wrote in message
...
>>> USAF is talking about putting ten F-117A's in bone yard to save
>>> money. If you can get one, you won't have to reinvent the wheel.
>>

[ChuckSlusarczyk]

In article <m9A1c.113229$4o.140597@attbi_s52>, Pete Schaefer says...
>
>Oh my. That definitely ranks up there with the ugliest. A face that only a
>mother could love..
>
>
>"Richard Riley" > wrote in message
...
>> Oh my God, my eyes!!. I thought nothing was worse than the m-15
>> Belphegor http://www.luftfahrtmuseum.com/htmi/ii/i006951.htm

Aww you guys !!!Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. All it needs is a snazzy
paint job with some stripes and you'll hardly notice that it's butt ugly . One
of my choices is the Henri Fabre Floatplane circa 1910. A pusher canard design
with a biplane canard and single wing.It's most interesting feature was the wing
and canard spars which were located on tops of the airfoils leaving the lower
surfaces nice and smooth. It was said that it didn't perform very well .Hmmm
wonder why ??Maybe zoomy should test it :-)

See ya

Chuck

[Pete Schaefer]

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

"ChuckSlusarczyk" > wrote in message
...
> Aww you guys !!!Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. All it needs is a
snazzy

[ChuckSlusarczyk]

In article <waU1c.46037$PR3.953257@attbi_s03>, Pete Schaefer says...
>
>Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
>
>"ChuckSlusarczyk" > wrote in message
...
>> Aww you guys !!!Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. All it needs is a
>snazzy

Hmm. I thought that only applied to women :-)

Chuck S