Santa's Check Ride

[Jim Vincent]

Santa Claus, like all pilots, gets regular visits from the Federal Aviation
Administration, and the FAA examiner arrived last week for the pre-Christmas
flight check.

In preparation, Santa had the elves wash the sled and bathe all the reindeer.
Santa got his logbook out and made sure all his paperwork was in order.

He knew they would examine all his equipment and truly put Santa's flying
skills to the test.

The examiner walked slowly around the sled. He checked the reindeer harnesses,
the landing gear, and even Rudolph's nose. He painstakingly reviewed Santa's
weight and balance calculations for sled's enormous payload.

Finally, they were ready for the check ride. Santa got in and fastened his seat
belt and shoulder harness and checked the compass. Then the examiner hopped in
carrying, to Santa's surprise, a shotgun.

"What's that for!?" asked Santa incredulously.

The examiner winked and said, "I'm not supposed to tell you this ahead of
time," as he leaned over to whisper in Santa's ear, "but you're gonna lose an
engine on takeoff."


Jim Vincent
N483SZ

[Shawn]

Jim Vincent wrote:
> Santa Claus, like all pilots, gets regular visits from the Federal Aviation
> Administration, and the FAA examiner arrived last week for the pre-Christmas
> flight check.
>
> In preparation, Santa had the elves wash the sled and bathe all the reindeer.
> Santa got his logbook out and made sure all his paperwork was in order.
>
> He knew they would examine all his equipment and truly put Santa's flying
> skills to the test.
>
> The examiner walked slowly around the sled. He checked the reindeer harnesses,
> the landing gear, and even Rudolph's nose. He painstakingly reviewed Santa's
> weight and balance calculations for sled's enormous payload.
>
> Finally, they were ready for the check ride. Santa got in and fastened his seat
> belt and shoulder harness and checked the compass. Then the examiner hopped in
> carrying, to Santa's surprise, a shotgun.
>
> "What's that for!?" asked Santa incredulously.
>
> The examiner winked and said, "I'm not supposed to tell you this ahead of
> time," as he leaned over to whisper in Santa's ear, "but you're gonna lose an
> engine on takeoff."

Why an FAA guy? Does he have jurisdiction at the North Pole? And why
can't he get just logbook endorsement from an elf with his CFIS? Are we
supposed to believe that Santa's never had a check ride? Boy that opens
a big legal can of worms right there. Hope St Nick's paid his AOPA
legal defense fees.
;-)

Shawn

P.S. So what kind of waiver does Santa get to fly in the presidential
TFRs? Or are all the kiddies in Crawford SOL?

[Paul Lynch]

Actually I heard the checkride was done early because Santa did not have the
appropriate paperwork to satisfy the new TSA requirements. If they don't
change the new rule Santa will be grounded in 2006!


"Shawn" > wrote in message
...
> Jim Vincent wrote:
>> Santa Claus, like all pilots, gets regular visits from the Federal
>> Aviation
>> Administration, and the FAA examiner arrived last week for the
>> pre-Christmas
>> flight check. In preparation, Santa had the elves wash the sled and bathe
>> all the reindeer.
>> Santa got his logbook out and made sure all his paperwork was in order.
>> He knew they would examine all his equipment and truly put Santa's flying
>> skills to the test. The examiner walked slowly around the sled. He
>> checked the reindeer harnesses,
>> the landing gear, and even Rudolph's nose. He painstakingly reviewed
>> Santa's
>> weight and balance calculations for sled's enormous payload. Finally,
>> they were ready for the check ride. Santa got in and fastened his seat
>> belt and shoulder harness and checked the compass. Then the examiner
>> hopped in
>> carrying, to Santa's surprise, a shotgun. "What's that for!?" asked Santa
>> incredulously. The examiner winked and said, "I'm not supposed to tell
>> you this ahead of
>> time," as he leaned over to whisper in Santa's ear, "but you're gonna
>> lose an
>> engine on takeoff."
>
> Why an FAA guy? Does he have jurisdiction at the North Pole? And why
> can't he get just logbook endorsement from an elf with his CFIS? Are we
> supposed to believe that Santa's never had a check ride? Boy that opens a
> big legal can of worms right there. Hope St Nick's paid his AOPA legal
> defense fees.
> ;-)
>
> Shawn
>
> P.S. So what kind of waiver does Santa get to fly in the presidential
> TFRs? Or are all the kiddies in Crawford SOL?