A Flying Joke

[Tina]

Yes, it's a part 135 joke, not a part 91 one, sent to me by a Jewish
friend.

THE FLIGHT

It was mealtime during a flight on El-Al. "Would you like dinner?"

the flight attendant asked Moishe, seated in front.

''What are my choices?" Moishe asked

"Yes or no," she replied.

--------------------------------------
Well, I thought is was funny.

[Jim Logajan]

Tina > wrote:
> Yes, it's a part 135 joke, not a part 91 one, sent to me by a Jewish
> friend.
>
> THE FLIGHT
>
> It was mealtime during a flight on El-Al. "Would you like dinner?"
> the flight attendant asked Moishe, seated in front.
> ''What are my choices?" Moishe asked
> "Yes or no," she replied.
>
> --------------------------------------
> Well, I thought is was funny.

Well, that's because you are young. :-)
Take this authoritative source, please:

"Researchers find older folks don't get the joke"
http://news-info.wustl.edu/news/page/normal/9698.html

"It's no laughing matter that older adults have a tougher time
understanding basic jokes than do younger adults.

It's partially due to a cognitive decline associated with age, according to
Washington University in St. Louis researchers Wingyun Mak, a graduate
student in psychology in Arts & Sciences, and Brian Carpenter, Ph.D.,
Washington University associate professor of psychology."

Sadly, I didn't get the joke sentence at the end of the article. First my
hair goes, then my memory, and now this!

[Vaughn Simon]

"Jim Logajan" > wrote in message
.. .
> Sadly, I didn't get the joke sentence at the end of the article. First my
> hair goes, then my memory, and now this!

Sadly, you just displayed on of the first serious symptoms of... Oh dear, I
forgot.

Vaughn

[Tina]

You know, as a professional shrink with an academic post, I'm thinking
this could be an interesting research project -- humor and older
pilots. Let's see if I can remember it when I'm back in my office
discussing thesis topics.

Hey, it makes as much or more sense as some of the other projects that
are funded.




On Jul 11, 7:58 pm, "Vaughn Simon" >
wrote:
> "Jim Logajan" > wrote in message
>
> .. .
>
> > Sadly, I didn't get the joke sentence at the end of the article. First my
> > hair goes, then my memory, and now this!
>
> Sadly, you just displayed on of the first serious symptoms of... Oh dear, I
> forgot.
>
> Vaughn

[Dudley Henriques[_2_]]

Tina wrote:
> You know, as a professional shrink with an academic post, I'm thinking
> this could be an interesting research project -- humor and older
> pilots. Let's see if I can remember it when I'm back in my office
> discussing thesis topics.
>
> Hey, it makes as much or more sense as some of the other projects that
> are funded.
>
>
>
>
> On Jul 11, 7:58 pm, "Vaughn Simon" >
> wrote:
>> "Jim Logajan" > wrote in message
>>
>> .. .
>>
>>> Sadly, I didn't get the joke sentence at the end of the article. First my
>>> hair goes, then my memory, and now this!
>> Sadly, you just displayed on of the first serious symptoms of... Oh dear, I
>> forgot.
>>
>> Vaughn
>
>
Hell, don't laugh, but there was once a funded project at one of the
service test pilot schools (I'm in fear of my life here if I divulge too
much :-) where the potential military use of the Frisbee was studied. I
recall the best of the best out there in the hangar one Saturday
afternoon throwing one around and jotting down copious and serious notes :-)
Don't know whatever happened to the final white paper, but I believe
it's filed in there somewhere along with the one trying to decide if a
fly lands on the ceiling from a half loop or a half slow roll.
Believe it or not, I actually know the answer to this question. I'm
still working on Fermat's last theorem however!!! :-))))

Dudley Henriques

[Matt Whiting]

Dudley Henriques wrote:
> Tina wrote:
>> You know, as a professional shrink with an academic post, I'm thinking
>> this could be an interesting research project -- humor and older
>> pilots. Let's see if I can remember it when I'm back in my office
>> discussing thesis topics.
>>
>> Hey, it makes as much or more sense as some of the other projects that
>> are funded.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> On Jul 11, 7:58 pm, "Vaughn Simon" >
>> wrote:
>>> "Jim Logajan" > wrote in message
>>>
>>> .. .
>>>
>>>> Sadly, I didn't get the joke sentence at the end of the article.
>>>> First my
>>>> hair goes, then my memory, and now this!
>>> Sadly, you just displayed on of the first serious symptoms of...
>>> Oh dear, I
>>> forgot.
>>>
>>> Vaughn
>>
>>
> Hell, don't laugh, but there was once a funded project at one of the
> service test pilot schools (I'm in fear of my life here if I divulge too
> much :-) where the potential military use of the Frisbee was studied. I
> recall the best of the best out there in the hangar one Saturday
> afternoon throwing one around and jotting down copious and serious notes
> :-)
> Don't know whatever happened to the final white paper, but I believe
> it's filed in there somewhere along with the one trying to decide if a
> fly lands on the ceiling from a half loop or a half slow roll.
> Believe it or not, I actually know the answer to this question. I'm
> still working on Fermat's last theorem however!!! :-))))

Ok, Dudley, cough up the answer!

Matt

[Morgans[_2_]]

"Dudley Henriques" > wrote

> Don't know whatever happened to the final white paper, but I believe it's
> filed in there somewhere along with the one trying to decide if a fly lands on
> the ceiling from a half loop or a half slow roll.
> Believe it or not, I actually know the answer to this question.

I'm sure you know this, since you are a fly expert <g> but did you know that a
fly has to jump backwards to take-off?

That is why if you wait for a fly to walk forward, and swat (or catch it) you
have a chance to get it, because he has to stop and shift into reverse!

So, does the fly do a downwind take-off as normal procedure, or does he do a
downwind-into the wind take-off?

Who's on first? <g>
--
Jim in NC

[Dudley Henriques[_2_]]

Matt Whiting wrote:
> Dudley Henriques wrote:
>> Tina wrote:
>>> You know, as a professional shrink with an academic post, I'm thinking
>>> this could be an interesting research project -- humor and older
>>> pilots. Let's see if I can remember it when I'm back in my office
>>> discussing thesis topics.
>>>
>>> Hey, it makes as much or more sense as some of the other projects that
>>> are funded.
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> On Jul 11, 7:58 pm, "Vaughn Simon" >
>>> wrote:
>>>> "Jim Logajan" > wrote in message
>>>>
>>>> .. .
>>>>
>>>>> Sadly, I didn't get the joke sentence at the end of the article.
>>>>> First my
>>>>> hair goes, then my memory, and now this!
>>>> Sadly, you just displayed on of the first serious symptoms
>>>> of... Oh dear, I
>>>> forgot.
>>>>
>>>> Vaughn
>>>
>>>
>> Hell, don't laugh, but there was once a funded project at one of the
>> service test pilot schools (I'm in fear of my life here if I divulge
>> too much :-) where the potential military use of the Frisbee was
>> studied. I recall the best of the best out there in the hangar one
>> Saturday afternoon throwing one around and jotting down copious and
>> serious notes :-)
>> Don't know whatever happened to the final white paper, but I believe
>> it's filed in there somewhere along with the one trying to decide if a
>> fly lands on the ceiling from a half loop or a half slow roll.
>> Believe it or not, I actually know the answer to this question. I'm
>> still working on Fermat's last theorem however!!! :-))))
>
> Ok, Dudley, cough up the answer!
>
> Matt
I'd love to, but the guys at Princeton might get on me a bit. Andrew
Wile solved it years ago. I'm just trying to figure out how the hell he
did it :-))
Dudley Henriques

[Matt Whiting]

Dudley Henriques wrote:
> Matt Whiting wrote:
>> Dudley Henriques wrote:
>>> Tina wrote:
>>>> You know, as a professional shrink with an academic post, I'm thinking
>>>> this could be an interesting research project -- humor and older
>>>> pilots. Let's see if I can remember it when I'm back in my office
>>>> discussing thesis topics.
>>>>
>>>> Hey, it makes as much or more sense as some of the other projects that
>>>> are funded.
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> On Jul 11, 7:58 pm, "Vaughn Simon" >
>>>> wrote:
>>>>> "Jim Logajan" > wrote in message
>>>>>
>>>>> .. .
>>>>>
>>>>>> Sadly, I didn't get the joke sentence at the end of the article.
>>>>>> First my
>>>>>> hair goes, then my memory, and now this!
>>>>> Sadly, you just displayed on of the first serious symptoms
>>>>> of... Oh dear, I
>>>>> forgot.
>>>>>
>>>>> Vaughn
>>>>
>>>>
>>> Hell, don't laugh, but there was once a funded project at one of the
>>> service test pilot schools (I'm in fear of my life here if I divulge
>>> too much :-) where the potential military use of the Frisbee was
>>> studied. I recall the best of the best out there in the hangar one
>>> Saturday afternoon throwing one around and jotting down copious and
>>> serious notes :-)
>>> Don't know whatever happened to the final white paper, but I believe
>>> it's filed in there somewhere along with the one trying to decide if
>>> a fly lands on the ceiling from a half loop or a half slow roll.
>>> Believe it or not, I actually know the answer to this question. I'm
>>> still working on Fermat's last theorem however!!! :-))))
>>
>> Ok, Dudley, cough up the answer!
>>
>> Matt
> I'd love to, but the guys at Princeton might get on me a bit. Andrew
> Wile solved it years ago. I'm just trying to figure out how the hell he
> did it :-))
> Dudley Henriques

The answer is neither! I should have known.

http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a5_043.html

Matt

[muff528]

"Tina" > wrote in message
oups.com...
> Yes, it's a part 135 joke, not a part 91 one, sent to me by a Jewish
> friend.
>
> THE FLIGHT
>
> It was mealtime during a flight on El-Al. "Would you like dinner?"
>
> the flight attendant asked Moishe, seated in front.
>
> ''What are my choices?" Moishe asked
>
> "Yes or no," she replied.
>
> --------------------------------------
> Well, I thought is was funny.
>

LOL!
Sounds like the same choices I had at home as a kid.....but if my choice was
"no"
I still had to sit at the table until dinner was over. :-)
,TP

[Dudley Henriques[_2_]]

Matt Whiting wrote:
> Dudley Henriques wrote:
>> Matt Whiting wrote:
>>> Dudley Henriques wrote:
>>>> Tina wrote:
>>>>> You know, as a professional shrink with an academic post, I'm thinking
>>>>> this could be an interesting research project -- humor and older
>>>>> pilots. Let's see if I can remember it when I'm back in my office
>>>>> discussing thesis topics.
>>>>>
>>>>> Hey, it makes as much or more sense as some of the other projects that
>>>>> are funded.
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> On Jul 11, 7:58 pm, "Vaughn Simon" >
>>>>> wrote:
>>>>>> "Jim Logajan" > wrote in message
>>>>>>
>>>>>> .. .
>>>>>>
>>>>>>> Sadly, I didn't get the joke sentence at the end of the article.
>>>>>>> First my
>>>>>>> hair goes, then my memory, and now this!
>>>>>> Sadly, you just displayed on of the first serious symptoms
>>>>>> of... Oh dear, I
>>>>>> forgot.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Vaughn
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>> Hell, don't laugh, but there was once a funded project at one of the
>>>> service test pilot schools (I'm in fear of my life here if I divulge
>>>> too much :-) where the potential military use of the Frisbee was
>>>> studied. I recall the best of the best out there in the hangar one
>>>> Saturday afternoon throwing one around and jotting down copious and
>>>> serious notes :-)
>>>> Don't know whatever happened to the final white paper, but I believe
>>>> it's filed in there somewhere along with the one trying to decide if
>>>> a fly lands on the ceiling from a half loop or a half slow roll.
>>>> Believe it or not, I actually know the answer to this question. I'm
>>>> still working on Fermat's last theorem however!!! :-))))
>>>
>>> Ok, Dudley, cough up the answer!
>>>
>>> Matt
>> I'd love to, but the guys at Princeton might get on me a bit. Andrew
>> Wile solved it years ago. I'm just trying to figure out how the hell
>> he did it :-))
>> Dudley Henriques
>
> The answer is neither! I should have known.
>
> http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a5_043.html
>
> Matt

You have broken the code! Go to the head of the class!!
DH

[Dudley Henriques[_2_]]

Morgans wrote:
>
> "Dudley Henriques" > wrote
>
>> Don't know whatever happened to the final white paper, but I believe
>> it's filed in there somewhere along with the one trying to decide if a
>> fly lands on the ceiling from a half loop or a half slow roll.
>> Believe it or not, I actually know the answer to this question.
>
> I'm sure you know this, since you are a fly expert <g> but did you know
> that a fly has to jump backwards to take-off?
>
> That is why if you wait for a fly to walk forward, and swat (or catch
> it) you have a chance to get it, because he has to stop and shift into
> reverse!
>
> So, does the fly do a downwind take-off as normal procedure, or does he
> do a downwind-into the wind take-off?
>
> Who's on first? <g>

You know Jim; you and I HAVE to get a life!!!! :-))
DH

[Montblack]

("Dudley Henriques" wrote)
> You know Jim; you and I HAVE to get a life!!!! :-))


You two could hang around together - as in upside-down.


Paul-Mont :-)

[Kingfish]

On Jul 11, 9:11 pm, "Morgans" > wrote:
> I'm sure you know this, since you are a fly expert <g> but did you know that a
> fly has to jump backwards to take-off?
>
> That is why if you wait for a fly to walk forward, and swat (or catch it) you
> have a chance to get it, because he has to stop and shift into reverse!

My fly-eliminating record is unmatched. I saw the fly's takeoff
demonstrated years ago in slow-motion and have *effectively* adjusted
my approach. Instead of attacking from overhead, you surround the
target (hapless fly) from the sides and when he figgers out something
bad is about to happen and jumps up (and backwards as Morgans pointed
out) - SPLAT!!! Terminated with extreme prejudice.

[El Maximo]

"Kingfish" > wrote in message
> My fly-eliminating record is unmatched. I saw the fly's takeoff
> demonstrated years ago in slow-motion and have *effectively* adjusted
> my approach. Instead of attacking from overhead, you surround the
> target (hapless fly) from the sides and when he figgers out something
> bad is about to happen and jumps up (and backwards as Morgans pointed
> out) - SPLAT!!! Terminated with extreme prejudice.

That's too cruel. What you do is move your opened hand rapidly behind the
fly. Just as you pass an inch over the fly, close your fist. It turns out
you just caught a fly. Repeat this three times and follow these
instructions:

http://ruminate.net/pdm/humor/work-well-together/

[Larry Dighera]

On Thu, 12 Jul 2007 00:14:09 -0000, Tina > wrote
in . com>:

>Hey, it makes as much or more sense as some of the other projects that
>are funded.

Oh, you mean like this Johns Hopkins University study:


http://groups.google.com/group/rec.aviation.piloting/browse_thread/thread/ecf0f71290f88aa1/5d9526f3742820a2?lnk=st&q=&rnum=1#5d9526f3742820a2

[El Maximo]

"Tina" > wrote in message
oups.com...
> Yes, it's a part 135 joke, not a part 91 one, sent to me by a Jewish
> friend.

Actually, it's part 121, but it's still funny.

[Doug Semler]

On Jul 11, 7:51 pm, Jim Logajan > wrote:
> Tina > wrote:
> > Yes, it's a part 135 joke, not a part 91 one, sent to me by a Jewish
> > friend.
>
> > THE FLIGHT
>
> > It was mealtime during a flight on El-Al. "Would you like dinner?"
> > the flight attendant asked Moishe, seated in front.
> > ''What are my choices?" Moishe asked
> > "Yes or no," she replied.
>
> > --------------------------------------
> > Well, I thought is was funny.
>
> Well, that's because you are young. :-)

Interesting conclusion considering the context of the joke. I would
have thought that an older American hearing the joke would be more apt
to "get it" in light of the history of American airline deregulation.
(the implication being that an older American would be more apt to
have first hand knowledge of the experiences both pre and post
deregulation). Since I am too young, the joke is funny to me, but may
be even more funny if I had the experience of having pre-deregulation
service.

As an aside, it seems that it may be even more context sensitive by
the choice of El Al as the airline and (perhaps) references to
"lessons learned" when deregulating airlines.

[Ross]

Dudley Henriques wrote:



> Believe it or not, I actually know the answer to this question. I'm
> still working on Fermat's last theorem however!!! :-))))
>
> Dudley Henriques

Great book!!!! I enjoyed it...


--

Regards, Ross
C-172F 180HP
KSWI

[Jay Beckman[_2_]]

On Jul 11, 5:50 pm, Dudley Henriques > wrote:
> Tina wrote:
> > You know, as a professional shrink with an academic post, I'm thinking
> > this could be an interesting research project -- humor and older
> > pilots. Let's see if I can remember it when I'm back in my office
> > discussing thesis topics.
>
> > Hey, it makes as much or more sense as some of the other projects that
> > are funded.
>
> > On Jul 11, 7:58 pm, "Vaughn Simon" >
> > wrote:
> >> "Jim Logajan" > wrote in message
>
> .. .
>
> >>> Sadly, I didn't get the joke sentence at the end of the article. First my
> >>> hair goes, then my memory, and now this!
> >> Sadly, you just displayed on of the first serious symptoms of... Oh dear, I
> >> forgot.
>
> >> Vaughn
>
> Hell, don't laugh, but there was once a funded project at one of the
> service test pilot schools (I'm in fear of my life here if I divulge too
> much :-) where the potential military use of the Frisbee was studied. I
> recall the best of the best out there in the hangar one Saturday
> afternoon throwing one around and jotting down copious and serious notes :-)
> Don't know whatever happened to the final white paper, but I believe
> it's filed in there somewhere along with the one trying to decide if a
> fly lands on the ceiling from a half loop or a half slow roll.

IIRC, it's down the same aisle where The Ark ended up at the end of
the Indiana Jones movie...

Jay Beckman
PP-ASEL
Chandler, AZ
www.pbase.com/flyingphotog

[Morgans[_2_]]

"Dudley Henriques" > wrote

> Hell, don't laugh, but there was once a funded project at one of the service
> test pilot schools (I'm in fear of my life here if I divulge too much :-)
> where the potential military use of the Frisbee was studied.

Let's see. It could be made as a hand grenade. I'll bet you could throw it
further, shaped like a Frisbee. It could also have a little hook, and thrown
around a corner.

Just be careful to not throw it too high up into the air, or it will act like a
boomerang, and explode back at your feet!

Hey, then it could be called a bomb-er-ang. Or a boob-meringue! <g>
--
Jim in NC

[Tina]

I have come to regret having started this thread.

Never the less, what could be a more appropiate way to end it with a
lawyer/dumb blond/ airplane joke?


Seat belts fastened?


> > Subject: The Lawyer and the Blonde
> >
> >
> > The Lawyer and the Blonde
> >
> > A lawyer and a blonde woman are sitting next to each other
on a long
> > flight. The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun
game. The blonde
>is
> > tired and just wants to take a nap, so she politely
declines and tries
>to
> > catch a few winks.
> >
> > The lawyer persists, that the game is a lot of fun. "I ask
you a
>question,
> > and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only $5; you
ask me one,
> > and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500."
> >
> > This catches the blonde's attention; and, to keep him
quiet, she
> > agrees to play the game. The lawyer asks the first
question. "What's the
> > distance from the earth to the moon?" The blonde doesn't
say a word,
> > reaches in to her purse, pulls out a five-dollar bill, and
hands it to
>the
>lawyer.
> >
> > Now, it's the blonde's turn. She asks the lawyer, "What
goes up a hill
> > with three legs, and comes down with four?"
> >
> > The lawyer uses his laptop, searches all references. He
uses the Air
>phone;
> > he searches the Net and even the Library of Congress. He
sends e-mails
> > to all the smart friends he knows, all to no avail.
> >
> > After one hour of searching he finally gives up. He wakes
up the
> > blonde and hands her $500. The blonde takes the $500 and
goes back to
>sleep.
> >
> > The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He wakes
her up and
> > asks, "Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
comes down with
>four?"
> >
> > The blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5 and
goes back to
>sleep.

[Dudley Henriques[_2_]]

Morgans wrote:
>
> "Dudley Henriques" > wrote
>
>> Hell, don't laugh, but there was once a funded project at one of the
>> service test pilot schools (I'm in fear of my life here if I divulge
>> too much :-) where the potential military use of the Frisbee was studied.
>
> Let's see. It could be made as a hand grenade. I'll bet you could throw
> it further, shaped like a Frisbee. It could also have a little hook,
> and thrown around a corner.
>
> Just be careful to not throw it too high up into the air, or it will act
> like a boomerang, and explode back at your feet!
>
> Hey, then it could be called a bomb-er-ang. Or a boob-meringue! <g>

I knew it...we HAVE to get a life!!!
Actually, I think the only idea that came out of the TPS "research"
might have been Odd Job's Hat :-)
DH

[Jim Logajan]

Tina > wrote:
> I have come to regret having started this thread.
>
> Never the less, what could be a more appropiate way to end it with a
> lawyer/dumb blond/ airplane joke?

Funny! But I didn't see any dumb blonde in the joke. :-)

So a priest, a rabbi, and a blonde walk into a bar and the bartender says
"What is this, a joke?"

Meanwhile, across town, another priest, another rabbi, and an imam walk
into a bar and the imam asks "What am I doing in a bar joke?"

Meanwhile, back at the ranch....

[Montblack]

("Jim Logajan" wrote)
> Funny! But I didn't see any dumb blonde in the joke. :-)


.....the lawyer was also blonde.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?

A: To prove to the raccoon it could be done.


Paul-Mont

[Blueskies]

"Tina" > wrote in message oups.com...
> You know, as a professional shrink with an academic post, I'm thinking
> this could be an interesting research project -- humor and older
> pilots. Let's see if I can remember it when I'm back in my office
> discussing thesis topics.
>
> Hey, it makes as much or more sense as some of the other projects that
> are funded.
>
>
>

Be sure to send some of the grant money my way. I can come up with all sorts of bad jokes that old folks will not laugh
at...

:-]

[Judah]

Tina > wrote in news:1184195608.163185.159640
@n60g2000hse.googlegroups.com:

> Yes, it's a part 135 joke, not a part 91 one, sent to me by a Jewish
> friend.
>
> THE FLIGHT
>
> It was mealtime during a flight on El-Al. "Would you like dinner?"
>
> the flight attendant asked Moishe, seated in front.
>
> ''What are my choices?" Moishe asked
>
> "Yes or no," she replied.
>
> --------------------------------------
> Well, I thought is was funny.
>

It's funniest if you've actually flown El Al.


Of course, these days, most airlines are following that standard. In fact,
most airlines have stopped asking the question altogether...

[Vaughn Simon]

"El Maximo" > wrote in message
...
>
> http://ruminate.net/pdm/humor/work-well-together/

Looks like a fun project.

Way back in my Navy days in Maryland, we used to attach tiny banners to
them and allow them to fly around the Nuclear Power School. Sometimes you
would see the same banner (with the same un-PC message) orbiting the hallways
for several days.

Vaughn

[Judah]

"El Maximo" > wrote in news:4mpli.165455$Sa4.48219
@bgtnsc05-news.ops.worldnet.att.net:

> "Kingfish" > wrote in message
>> My fly-eliminating record is unmatched. I saw the fly's takeoff
>> demonstrated years ago in slow-motion and have *effectively* adjusted
>> my approach. Instead of attacking from overhead, you surround the
>> target (hapless fly) from the sides and when he figgers out something
>> bad is about to happen and jumps up (and backwards as Morgans pointed
>> out) - SPLAT!!! Terminated with extreme prejudice.
>
> That's too cruel. What you do is move your opened hand rapidly behind the
> fly. Just as you pass an inch over the fly, close your fist. It turns out
> you just caught a fly. Repeat this three times and follow these
> instructions:
>
> http://ruminate.net/pdm/humor/work-well-together/

But can you do it with Chopsticks, Grasshopper?