Blakey Era Of Failure

Blakey Era Of Failure

The FAA, fresh off the fiasco that is known by it's formal
name---the Blakey Era Of Failure--- is clinging to the last
lifeboat left from her titanic voyage. In this press
release, the Failed Aviation Administration crows that they
are going to require an "INITIAL" set of new avionics
requirements for all aircraft flying in our nation's busiest
airspace---IN THIRTEEN YEARS.

Under a 1.8 billion dollar contract awarded last month by
FAA Administrator Marion Blakey to AIA member ITT, the
satellite tracking system known as ADS-B will be installed
in the Gulf Of Mexico (George Bush,) Philadelphia (Arlen
Specter?) Louisville, Kentucky (UPS,) and that hotbed of
"our nation's busiest airspace," Juneau, Alaska
(soon-to-be-indicted Ted Stevens.)

In other news, far better reported elsewhere, MarClifKey
golden-parachuted out of the FAA Administrator's spot and
right into a six-figure featherbed with who, of all people?
Why...AIA, of course.

There are several money shots in the FAA's press release.
Let's look at a few:

"Aircraft not flying in controlled airspace will not be
required to have ADS-B avionics." Well, that's just stupid.
The agency is intent on decommissioning their
ground-based system of radars and navaids in favor of this
pie-in-the-troposphere, in spite of Inspector General
recommendations to the contrary. It's only natural that the
FAA would forget the lessons of September 11th, since most
of the leadership on that day---the Garveys and Belgers and
Griffiths---have moved on. But they knew. You cannot turn
off the radars and mandate partial compliance...because
anyone who is not equipped will be INVISIBLE. That should
creep out anybody in a building higher than two stories but
will be welcome news to Al. Al Qaeda.

"Satellite technology is here to stay." Really, Bobby? (Or
is it Robert? I can't keep up. The Boss is calling you
Bobby. You might need to flip-flop back.)

I am glad satellite technology is here to stay because I
have had a Garmin GPS on the dash of my vehicle for about
ten years and I haven't owned a paper map in as long. It
can put me within ten feet of any address in North America.
The built-in GPS in Lovey's mini-truckster is just as
deadly, and frankly does everything but make dinner
reservations for us (which is, I think, an option. Or is
that On-Star?) Cabbies use it. Truckers use it. Hookers
use it. I guess it's OK for pilots to use it, too. And
with the FAA's help, they will be able to---in FOUR
places---IN THIRTEEN YEARS!!! More cake and punch for
everybody! Thank God we stole all that money from the air
traffic controllers to pay for this "new" modern stuff.

"The ten-fold increase in the accuracy of satellite signals
may eventually allow air traffic controllers to reduce
separation standards between aircraft, significantly
increasing the number of aircraft that can be safely managed
in the nation’s skies." NO. DOUBT. But is is going to be
worse than the I-5 at rush hour on the ground. Gate delays,
ground holds, crowded runways and terminals and increases in
incursions and errors and all the signs of insufficient
GROUND infrastructure. Just like today. You can turn the
sky black with aircraft. Without a place to put 'em as they
run out of fuel and descend...you're going to turn the
ground black. With smoking wreckage craters.

And finally...how's this ignorant press release for chutzpah
anyway? Here...let me re-write it to make it more legible:

"We can't manage the system today. We have cancelled most
modernization projects, botched privatization of flight
service, alienated our employees and pooped our panties when
it comes to flight delays. We don't care about
cancellations, infrastructure improvements and just about
anything else you can dream up. But in THIRTEEN YEARS, we
are going to have some fancy-ass satellite technology, not
unlike what John Carr was using in his conversion van in
1997, TWENTY THREE YEARS ago, in place in some aircraft
operating out of four airports."

As Jed Clampett would say......"Weeeeeeeeeeeeee-doggie!"

Can you imagine Steven Jobs at Apple crowing to the press
about a technological innovation---perhaps the
I-Phone---that will debut in thirteen years, work in four
cities, and be available to some citizens? The press would
laugh his narrow ass off the stage so fast even Bill Gates
couldn't buy back his credibility. And yet here is the
remains of the FAA---what Blakey didn't destroy---trying
gamely to run just such a line of smack on an unsuspecting
public. And the aviation press eats it up like it was
mother's milk.

Good job, Bobert. You learned your lesson well. Three card
monte, anybody