"Homeland Security" in Iowa

So we took my 26 year old, blonde, blue-eyed, 6' 4" nephew back to the Cedar
Rapids airport last night, to catch his red-eye flight back to Seattle. He
was as sick as a dog (flu?) and weak as a kitten, but go he must, so off he
went...

The "Eastern Iowa Airport" is a pretty sleepy place on a Sunday night --
even the airport bar was closed (gasp!) -- and there were MAYBE 50 people in
the entire airport terminal, including employees. Since we were no longer
allowed to go to the gate with him, we said our goodbyes at the entrance to
the security checkpoint.

This area was staffed by TEN (10!) uniformed TSA guys, waiting to pounce on
the terrorists who were (no doubt) thronging into the heartland. My nephew
strolled through the X-ray machine, passed uneventfully, and then put his
single carry-on bag (a back-pack) on the conveyor...

....from our distance it was obvious that the TSA guys were suddenly tense,
and -- although we were beyond earshot -- it was easy to see that SOMETHING
was wrong. My nephew, weak with flu, stood staring numbly at the people who
had suddenly gathered around him. He was obviously confused.

Soon he was taken to the side. Within 30 seconds two uniformed police
officers strode purposefully past us, coming from another part of the
airport but obviously on their way to see my nephew. The other officers
were holding something that we couldn't quite see, and were speaking quite
seriously to him, all the while keeping him surrounded by a minimum of four
TSA guards.

After 10 minutes of this, they took him into an area we could not see. With
visions of rubber hoses and bright lights, we paced back and forth, unable
to do ANYTHING to help.

What could it be? He certainly fit the terrorist "threat profile" -- for
the "Swedish Liberation Army", perhaps. Since, to our knowledge, Sweden
had not been named an "Axis of Evil" country, we couldn't fathom what had
triggered this response.

After an interminable five minutes he emerged and gave us a weary wave as he
headed off to his gate. Of course we were unable to find out what had gone
wrong, or why he had been detained -- the TSA folks simply would not tell
us, and my nephew had no cell phone.

We drove home wondering what the hell my nephew could have done?

Today my sister called, to drop the other shoe. Turns out my OTHER sister
(his aunt) had given my poor nephew a wrapped Xmas present, to give to his
Dad. Inside this present was a "Leatherman Multi-tool" -- obviously
something that could be used as a weapon! My poor nephew had NO idea what
was in this wrapped gift, and my sister had assumed that he would carry the
present in his "checked" baggage -- not in his "carry-on" baggage. Because
he didn't know if it was breakable, he had opted to carry the present where
it could not be broken.

So, he is now on a permanent list of "potential terrorist threats", is being
threatened with a $50.00 fine, was put through an awful situation over which
he had no control or knowledge, and my sister feels thoroughly awful. He
barely made his flight, and (of course) his Dad didn't receive his Xmas
present, since the TSA confiscated it.

And the final irony of the whole story: the "Leatherman" tool, as with so
many things these days, was sealed in one of those plastic containers that
(you guessed it!) requires a knife or scissors to open...
--
Jay Honeck
Iowa City, IA
Pathfinder N56993
www.AlexisParkInn.com
"Your Aviation Destination"

"Has your baggage been in your control the entire time?"
"Has anyone asked you to carry anything in your baggage for them?"

I fly on business constantly, and forgot about a swiss army knife deep
in the bowels of my carry-on. By the time they had finished X-raying
that bag, I swear it glowed in the dark. Some TSA emplyoyee is now the
proud owner of my knife, but mea culpa for having it!

Jay Honeck wrote:
So we took my 26 year old, blonde, blue-eyed, 6' 4" nephew back to the Cedar
Rapids airport last night, to catch his red-eye flight back to Seattle. He
was as sick as a dog (flu?) and weak as a kitten, but go he must, so off he
went...

The "Eastern Iowa Airport" is a pretty sleepy place on a Sunday night --
even the airport bar was closed (gasp!) -- and there were MAYBE 50 people in
the entire airport terminal, including employees. Since we were no longer
allowed to go to the gate with him, we said our goodbyes at the entrance to
the security checkpoint.

This area was staffed by TEN (10!) uniformed TSA guys, waiting to pounce on
the terrorists who were (no doubt) thronging into the heartland. My nephew
strolled through the X-ray machine, passed uneventfully, and then put his
single carry-on bag (a back-pack) on the conveyor...

...from our distance it was obvious that the TSA guys were suddenly tense,
and -- although we were beyond earshot -- it was easy to see that SOMETHING
was wrong. My nephew, weak with flu, stood staring numbly at the people who
had suddenly gathered around him. He was obviously confused.

Soon he was taken to the side. Within 30 seconds two uniformed police
officers strode purposefully past us, coming from another part of the
airport but obviously on their way to see my nephew. The other officers
were holding something that we couldn't quite see, and were speaking quite
seriously to him, all the while keeping him surrounded by a minimum of four
TSA guards.

After 10 minutes of this, they took him into an area we could not see. With
visions of rubber hoses and bright lights, we paced back and forth, unable
to do ANYTHING to help.

What could it be? He certainly fit the terrorist "threat profile" -- for
the "Swedish Liberation Army", perhaps. Since, to our knowledge, Sweden
had not been named an "Axis of Evil" country, we couldn't fathom what had
triggered this response.

After an interminable five minutes he emerged and gave us a weary wave as he
headed off to his gate. Of course we were unable to find out what had gone
wrong, or why he had been detained -- the TSA folks simply would not tell
us, and my nephew had no cell phone.

We drove home wondering what the hell my nephew could have done?

Today my sister called, to drop the other shoe. Turns out my OTHER sister
(his aunt) had given my poor nephew a wrapped Xmas present, to give to his
Dad. Inside this present was a "Leatherman Multi-tool" -- obviously
something that could be used as a weapon! My poor nephew had NO idea what
was in this wrapped gift, and my sister had assumed that he would carry the
present in his "checked" baggage -- not in his "carry-on" baggage. Because
he didn't know if it was breakable, he had opted to carry the present where
it could not be broken.

So, he is now on a permanent list of "potential terrorist threats", is being
threatened with a $50.00 fine, was put through an awful situation over which
he had no control or knowledge, and my sister feels thoroughly awful. He
barely made his flight, and (of course) his Dad didn't receive his Xmas
present, since the TSA confiscated it.

And the final irony of the whole story: the "Leatherman" tool, as with so
many things these days, was sealed in one of those plastic containers that
(you guessed it!) requires a knife or scissors to open...

I'm beginning to think that we all demand to fly commercially.... NAKED! It
would make things so much easier.
--
Jim Burns III

Remove "nospam" to reply

"Jay Honeck" wrote in message
news:84_Hb.6418$xX.15221@attbi_s02...
So we took my 26 year old, blonde, blue-eyed, 6' 4" nephew back to the
Cedar
Rapids airport last night, to catch his red-eye flight back to Seattle.
He
was as sick as a dog (flu?) and weak as a kitten, but go he must, so off
he
went...

The "Eastern Iowa Airport" is a pretty sleepy place on a Sunday night --
even the airport bar was closed (gasp!) -- and there were MAYBE 50 people
in
the entire airport terminal, including employees. Since we were no longer
allowed to go to the gate with him, we said our goodbyes at the entrance
to
the security checkpoint.

This area was staffed by TEN (10!) uniformed TSA guys, waiting to pounce
on
the terrorists who were (no doubt) thronging into the heartland. My
nephew
strolled through the X-ray machine, passed uneventfully, and then put his
single carry-on bag (a back-pack) on the conveyor...

...from our distance it was obvious that the TSA guys were suddenly tense,
and -- although we were beyond earshot -- it was easy to see that
SOMETHING
was wrong. My nephew, weak with flu, stood staring numbly at the people
who
had suddenly gathered around him. He was obviously confused.

Soon he was taken to the side. Within 30 seconds two uniformed police
officers strode purposefully past us, coming from another part of the
airport but obviously on their way to see my nephew. The other officers
were holding something that we couldn't quite see, and were speaking quite
seriously to him, all the while keeping him surrounded by a minimum of
four
TSA guards.

After 10 minutes of this, they took him into an area we could not see.
With
visions of rubber hoses and bright lights, we paced back and forth, unable
to do ANYTHING to help.

What could it be? He certainly fit the terrorist "threat profile" -- for
the "Swedish Liberation Army", perhaps. Since, to our knowledge, Sweden
had not been named an "Axis of Evil" country, we couldn't fathom what had
triggered this response.

After an interminable five minutes he emerged and gave us a weary wave as
he
headed off to his gate. Of course we were unable to find out what had
gone
wrong, or why he had been detained -- the TSA folks simply would not tell
us, and my nephew had no cell phone.

We drove home wondering what the hell my nephew could have done?

Today my sister called, to drop the other shoe. Turns out my OTHER sister
(his aunt) had given my poor nephew a wrapped Xmas present, to give to his
Dad. Inside this present was a "Leatherman Multi-tool" -- obviously
something that could be used as a weapon! My poor nephew had NO idea
what
was in this wrapped gift, and my sister had assumed that he would carry
the
present in his "checked" baggage -- not in his "carry-on" baggage.
Because
he didn't know if it was breakable, he had opted to carry the present
where
it could not be broken.

So, he is now on a permanent list of "potential terrorist threats", is
being
threatened with a $50.00 fine, was put through an awful situation over
which
he had no control or knowledge, and my sister feels thoroughly awful. He
barely made his flight, and (of course) his Dad didn't receive his Xmas
present, since the TSA confiscated it.

And the final irony of the whole story: the "Leatherman" tool, as with so
many things these days, was sealed in one of those plastic containers that
(you guessed it!) requires a knife or scissors to open...
--
Jay Honeck
Iowa City, IA
Pathfinder N56993
www.AlexisParkInn.com
"Your Aviation Destination"

We drove home wondering what the hell my nephew could have done?
So, he is now on a permanent list of "potential terrorist threats",

Him and 5 million others (as of almost a year ago)...
http://www.cnn.com/2003/TRAVEL/03/10...t.security.ap/

However, I can't imagine someone this day and age carrying a box they have
no idea what's inside as carry-on.

However, I can't imagine someone this day and age carrying a box they have
no idea what's inside as carry-on.

Yeah, that was dumb. But he flies commercially maybe every other year, so
he just wasn't aware of the possible problems that could cause.

Had he told any of us what he was doing, we could have warned him...
--
Jay Honeck
Iowa City, IA
Pathfinder N56993
www.AlexisParkInn.com
"Your Aviation Destination"

Some TSA emplyoyee is now the
proud owner of my knife, but mea culpa for having it!


It's a sad day when we so easily assume the blame for not following idiotic
rules set up by bureaucrats who are working against us in the guise of secuity.

It's not your fault for having it.

It's the administration's fault for not allowing it.

Jose

--
(for Email, make the obvious changes in my address)

In article , Jim
wrote:

I'm beginning to think that we all demand to fly commercially.... NAKED! It
would make things so much easier.

Naw... a french woman stripped down to her undies at the checkpoint
here in Columbus last summer and got arrested.

In article , Nomen Nescio
] wrote:

I dread the day they catch a terrorist with a couple pounds of C-4
concealed....uh.....rectally.

Hey, the CIA made listening devices to look like tiger turds and seeded
the trails of Southeast Asia with them... it's possible.

"Martin Hotze" wrote in message news:bspvq4
also read: http://www.laweekly.com/ink/04/04/open-mikulan.php

A couple of exerpts from that article follows:

"I thought at that stage something was quite wrong," Smethurst says, "so I
asked the man with the coffee if there was some problem."

"I will tell you when there's a problem," he abruptly snapped, according to
Smethurst. Then he pointed to a nearby sign:

Your Silence Is Appreciated"


Jim he Umm, Bullsuqa . . . No, bullsquat ain't enough. I call bull****
on this one. The article was interesting up until this point. I will
refuse to believe that you will ever see this sign on any wall of any
government facility ever in the United States of America. The article gets
even more unbeleviable from here, though:


" As Smethurst's inked fingers were rolled onto the government form, she
noticed its heading: "Criminal." Eventually she was escorted under armed
guard to a pay phone to make the call she vainly believed would clear
everything up and allow her to stay in the country. (...). She was then
handcuffed and marched through the airport to another terminal, where LAX's
main detention center is located. After the phone call she pleaded for
food, having now been away from home nearly 24 hours. Smethurst offered
money for a snack to be brought to her - French fries, potato chips,
anything - but was refused. "


I would be most confident that most of this "story" is made up of complete
lies and hyperbole. If there is any truth at all to the story, I believe
the goofy author obvious did something silly like not registering with the
I-visa program or packing a leatherman in the carry-on or perhaps just
making made a complete ass of herself at the gate.

Don't believe everything you read, Martin.

--
Jim Fisher

One reality is that in the hands of someone young, strong, and willing to
die, a Leatherman tool is a weapon when he is the only one so armed in an
enclosed cabin...

The other reality is that as a nation we no longer have any balls... We
cower at the mere threat that someone may try to hurt us... I am ashamed of
my country....

Denny

"Jay Honeck" So, he is now on a permanent list
of "potential terrorist threats", is being
threatened with a $50.00 fine, was put through an awful situation over
which
he had no control or knowledge