Position and Hold at uncontrolled field

Or calling departure, liftoff, crosswind, turning downwind, downwind
abeam the numbers, base, final, over the threshold, leaving the
runway, clear the runway, ...

And always like this:

"Uh, um, Podunk Traffic, aahhhh...Cessna...Cessna November One Two
Three Four Pa-pa uhhhh Victor aaahhh....turning...downwind....uuhhhh,
Podunk uhhh Airport. I mean Traffic."

and by the time they get through all that.. I've entered the pattern on the
opposite side to a parallel runway.. and landed and cleared.. without a
word...

BECAUSE I COULD NOT GET A WORD IN BETWEEN ALL OF HIS RADIO CALLS AND
EVERYONE ELSE IN HIS PATTERN FOLLOWING HIS ****POOR EXAMPLE

"Glider tow clear, 20L"

Oh, and the local flight school uses the same CTAF freq to broadcast their
training positions and altitudes over a near by dry (right now wet) lake
bed.. it is within 5 miles of the airport, but outside the traffic pattern..
and then all the other "transient" calls made by pilots flying the highway..
IFR (I follow roads) well above the traffic pattern altitude...

but they know or do not know that there are gliders in the area.. its to
early in the day for lift to go that high... 50% of which don't carry
radios.. and there is an active jump zone 4 miles south.. but if they'd shut
up they could hear if the jump zone was active or not..

::: stepping down off radio discipline soapbox :::
BT