Most amusing land out

Following on from Cherokee's funny thread (which I'm afraid I turned into a
discussion on the Silver badge - sorry chaps!) perhaps people would like to
share their most amusing moments after landing out off the airfield. Here's
a few of mine:

The time I set off on a Silver attempt and made about 10miles before landing
in a very small paddock behind a rather smart house. I had just completed
the essential pee when a very attractive lady in a bikini leaned over the
fence and asked if I would like cup of tea? Turned out to be the wife of a
local boss of a big firm making excavators.

Then there was the time (again on a failed Silver - I think I had six
attempts) when I landed in a very nice freshly cut hay field in North
Yorkshire on a lovely sunny afternnon, once more behind a house. There was a
very alcoholic twenty first birthday party going on in the garden to which I
was invited (I think they thought I was glidergram). I got some of them to
help me derig the glider, climbed over the fence, and by the time my
retrieve crew reached me I was feeling no pain at all.

Or the time a syndicate partner flew our Oly 2b all of two miles to the
local public park. He couldn't find a phone (no mobiles in those days) so he
just caught the local bus back to the club. The bus conductor not
surprisingly refused to go anywhere near this small chap wearing a flying
suit and carrying a parachute and a barograph who had just got on to his
bus! The park keeper was still checking the notice board with the bye laws
to see if 'landing a glider' broke any of his rules when we arrived with the
trailer. Two small boys had been bribed to look after the glider. Something
you couldn't do today I think.

Alistair Wright
Melrose
Scotland

"Alistair Wright" wrote in message
...
Following on from Cherokee's funny thread (which I'm afraid I turned into
a discussion on the Silver badge - sorry chaps!) perhaps people would like
to share their most amusing moments after landing out off the airfield.
Here's a few of mine:

The time I set off on a Silver attempt and made about 10miles before
landing in a very small paddock behind a rather smart house. I had just
completed the essential pee when a very attractive lady in a bikini leaned
over the fence and asked if I would like cup of tea? Turned out to be the
wife of a local boss of a big firm making excavators.

Then there was the time (again on a failed Silver - I think I had six
attempts) when I landed in a very nice freshly cut hay field in North
Yorkshire on a lovely sunny afternnon, once more behind a house. There was
a very alcoholic twenty first birthday party going on in the garden to
which I was invited (I think they thought I was glidergram). I got some of
them to help me derig the glider, climbed over the fence, and by the time
my retrieve crew reached me I was feeling no pain at all.

Or the time a syndicate partner flew our Oly 2b all of two miles to the
local public park. He couldn't find a phone (no mobiles in those days) so
he just caught the local bus back to the club. The bus conductor not
surprisingly refused to go anywhere near this small chap wearing a flying
suit and carrying a parachute and a barograph who had just got on to his
bus! The park keeper was still checking the notice board with the bye
laws to see if 'landing a glider' broke any of his rules when we arrived
with the trailer. Two small boys had been bribed to look after the
glider. Something you couldn't do today I think.

Alistair Wright
Melrose
Scotland

One time I was flying a PW-2 Gapa locally, got low, picked a field, and
landed. Turns out it was right next to a private airport...their runway was
the driveway. We pulled the Gapa over to the runway and towed out.

Alistair Wright wrote:
Following on from Cherokee's funny thread (which I'm afraid I turned into a
discussion on the Silver badge - sorry chaps!) perhaps people would like to
share their most amusing moments after landing out off the airfield. Here's
a few of mine:

My first land out was in the club Discus at the end of a a 50 km out and
return - probably my 2nd or 3rd XC. I put it down on set-aside behind a
village 5 miles from home and got offered a ride back to the field. A
club mate and I hooked up the trailer and handled the retrieve ourselves.



--
martin@ | Martin Gregorie
gregorie. | Essex, UK
org |

On May 1, 11:59 am, Martin Gregorie
wrote:
Alistair Wright wrote:
Following on from Cherokee's funny thread (which I'm afraid I turned into a
discussion on the Silver badge - sorry chaps!) perhaps people would like to
share their most amusing moments after landing out off the airfield. Here's
a few of mine:

My first land out was in the club Discus at the end of a a 50 km out and
return - probably my 2nd or 3rd XC. I put it down on set-aside behind a
village 5 miles from home and got offered a ride back to the field. A
club mate and I hooked up the trailer and handled the retrieve ourselves.

--
martin@ | Martin Gregorie
gregorie. | Essex, UK
org |

Several years ago, I launched in my SHK with the Cambridge Club when
they were flying from RAF Duxford. I declared a long flight, but
weakening lift meant I couldn't fly over the RAF Alconbury MATZ to the
better lift and I gradually accepted that I'd have to land in a field
behind some houses in Rushden after orbiting for 20-25 minutes. I
notified the farmer and a local couple gave me a ride into Alconbury
town. I called an Air Force friend to see if I could get a ride back
to Duxford, but he had to report to work within the hour, so I rode
the local bus from Alconbury to Duxford. The bus dropped me on the
east side of RAF Duxford and I was faced with a long walk around the
perimeter to the gate though my car and trailer were only just over
the fence a bit. As I had my parachute pack with me, I used it to
cover the barbed wire strands atop the fence and climbed on over. I
drove back to Rushden, arriving about 9pm. Thank goodness for English
summer evenings, as the light was still good. I hiked over to the
nearest pub and found two large lads to help de-rig for the prospect
of free ale. That done, I had to return to RAF Mildenhall to work at
11:30pm. In those days, petrol stations closed early, but I arrived
on time, running on fumes and sweat and went through the rear security
gate as a slightly dozy guard waved me through, then saw the 37.5ft
trailer flash by. A few minutes later a pickup with an armed security
detail arrived asking what was in the box. After my standard cruise
missile response, I showed them the glider.

Frank Whiteley

On May 1, 11:59 am, Frank Whiteley wrote:
On May 1, 11:59 am, Martin Gregorie
wrote:

Alistair Wright wrote:
Following on from Cherokee's funny thread (which I'm afraid I turned into a
discussion on the Silver badge - sorry chaps!) perhaps people would like to
share their most amusing moments after landing out off the airfield.

Southeast ridge day out of Blairstown. It started raining, and the
wind direction changed. Turn around, land in a field which I could no
longer see but knew was there. Turned out to be a pig farm. Not one
nice field but several electric fences I hadn't spotted from the
ridge.
Uneventful short field landing, nobody home at any house for miles.
The pig farmer returned later, but hadn't done well at the market and
didn't want to turn the fence off. Said to the soaked glider pilot:
"Perhaps if we leave it there overnight small ones will grow around it
like mushrooms, and I can sell them at the market".
He let us take down the fence when Captain Curt showed up.
You meet some interesting people on landouts.
Jim

I was making a 500K O&R north from Parowan, Utah with some pretty
strong SW winds. Thought I might not make it all the way back but my
wonderful crew (wife) was eager to pratice retrieves so we went for
it. On the return I got stuck on the lee of a large mountain (12,500')
and was in urgent need of a landing place. After a very short sled
ride I spotted and landed in a small alfalfa field amongst sageland
with significant numbers of cattle.

After the landing (whew!) a gentleman with three small children, about
4, 6, & 8 years old approached me over the fence. 'We were watching
you all the way down,' he said. 'You landed in the right place, the
last guy didn't and hit a steer.' The kids giggled. Within minutes
three men arrived and we walked to the glider while I directed my
wonderfully efficient crew onto the field with hand signals. Comments
were made about the owner of the field who was not present and I got a
phone number. But I have to say things weren''t very warm and cozy
yet.

When we got to the glider I got down on my knees next to the cockpit,
faced the children, and said: "Who is going to be the first one to sit
in a real glider!" Smiles all around, mysteriously a camera appeared,
and we bagan to sit them into the cockpit. I asked the kids if they
would tell their class about this in 'show and tell' in school the
next day. "No, we are home schooled." Thinking fast, and being just a
bit familliar with the Mormon religion, I quiickly added: "Well, then
I am sure you can share this with your friends at the Sunday School
and Sacrament Meeting on Sunday." To which I recieved happy smiles,
not just from the kids, but from the men standing protectively
around.

After many poses and pictures we had the glider disassembled and into
the trailer in record time. The only problem being that I didn't have
enough work to satisfy all of the men. Those left out were even a bit
grumpy at being left out.

After their promises of pictures in the local weekly we were on our
way with waves and smiles all around.

Footnote: I was finally able to contact via phone the owner of the
land a while later, he was riding in his air conditioned hay baler at
the time. After I explained how grateful I was that his field had been
there when and where I needed it and giving him my insurance company
name and number he said: "Well, I'm pretty busy right now. I'm glad my
alfalfa saved your bacon. You couldn't have hurt much so don't worry
about it. Besides everyone at the Ward thought the pictures in the
paper were really neat."

Gotta love it.

Landing in an empty truck parking lot once. I mis-read the wind and
ended up landing downwind. As a result I was fast an unable to stop in
the lot and ended up crossing the road along the side of the parking
lot (Checked both ways for traffic before crossing, not that I could
have done anything about it if a car had been coming) and stopped in a
Farm Implement lot behind a house on the other side of the road.

Shortly after stopping a lady with a walker came out of the house and
told me that she had flew with the WAC's in WWII and thought having a
glider in her back yard was very cool. My wife had been following
along with the trailer and arrived about 10 minutes later. Had to be
one of the easiest and fastest retrieves I have ever done.

Brian

One day about 4 of us launched and after climbing to cloud base headed
out on a cloud street. We got about 25miles out and the cloud street
ended. I was flying my 1-26, the other planes were an ASW20, LS-6,
and a Pegasus. When we turned around we discovered the cloud street
disipating and struggled to find any lift at all. Being the lowest
performance glider I landed out 1st. I picked a field along side a
highway. As I rolled to a stop I noticed a convenience store across
the street. Talking to the other glider pilots they were struggling to
get back to the airport. They would arrange to come get me as soon as
they made it back to the airport. In the mean time I went across the
street and bought a sandwich, snacks and pop and went back to the
glider to eat lunch.

About every 10 minutes or so someone would stop and ask if everything
was all right, If needed any help, etc. I just told them I was waiting
for my trailer to show up. After about 45 minutes a Green Chevy
Pickup pulled up with the Blue and White light flashing in the
windsheild. An officer got out and asked me if I was the pilot. Then
he asked if any one was hurt. When I told him I was the pilot and no
one was hurt he went back to his pickup and picked up the radio and
called "You can cancel the firetruck and ambulance."

He then came back and told me that someone driving by had reported an
ultralight crashed in a feild. I guess I should have taken the wings
off and scattered them away from the fuselage. About that time the
firetruck and the ambulance arrived. They were almost there when the
call was canceled and they wanted to see what was going on. After
explaining to them that I had just done a normal landing and was just
waiting for my trailer to arrive all that was happening was me
finshing my lunch with Police, Fireman and Paramedics watching me. The
got bored and left after a bit.

Turned out that 2 of the other 3 glider landed out at well with only
one glider making it back. After retrieving the closest glider (he was
only about mile from the airport) the other 2 pilots came to get the
other pilot and myself.

Brian

these are all great!

Matt and I got visited by the State Police when we landed out last
spring in the Lark. He didnt stick around to help derig, said
something about a lot of towns in the area having prom that night,
sounded like a likely excuse...

My last landout in the Cherokee last year was 103 nautical miles
downwind in a beautiful fresh mowed hay field. On short final I
noticed a large group of about 30 people standing outside the house
watching me land. All were dressed in blue with straw hats and I knew
that I had arrived in Amish Paradise. Probably the friendliest folks
Ive met on a landout. Matt arrived with the trailer soon after.
Derig was very slow as the men really wanted to help, but were also
full of questions. The kids soaked it all in but didnt speak. Also
got a good picture and an article in the county newspaper.

Keep em coming!

Tony

Flying my Pegasus out of Mid-Atlantic Soaring in Fairfield, PA I found
myself low over some very hilly territory in Virginia at the base of the
ridge. I managed to make it into a small uphill field noting on final that
there was a large resort looking type of house on the property.

After securing the glider from rolling back down the hill I walked over to
the house which had a very large front door. My knock was answered by a man
in long robes. At that point I was sure I had entered the Twilight
Zone.....I mean it was Virginia afterall. Turns out it was a Franciscan
Monastery. They fortuntely had a phone (no cells in that day) so I called
the wife to come get me. One of the monks was fascinated with the idea of
flying gliders and while I derigged he asked my glider pilot wife many
questions. They became good friends and still exchange mail often. It was
good for yearly fruitcakes as well! He even snuck out one day so that my
wife could give take him for a glider flight. It was like watching a kid on
their first ride.

Casey Lenox
KC
Phoenix