Major McSally takes command :)

From: "Mortimer Schnerd, RN"


BUFDRVR wrote:
SAC's missiles pointed upward, ours fired horizontally. We
actually got to shoot ours.

You wouldn't be typing this if SAC got to shoot theirs.



What's that old squadron song? "Will I Go Boom Today"?


Mortimer Schnerd, RN

The song to which you refer was popular in Macdill in the 1940s to 1960s.

"Will you go boom today? Will you go boom today? We lost one yesterday, it
landed in the bay."

The song varies by aircraft type.

There was a song about the B-36 sung to the tune of Battle Hymn of the
Republic:

"The B-36 it flies at forty thousand feet, the B-36 flies at forty thousand
feet. THe B-36 it flies at forty thousand feet, but it only has a teensy,
weensy bomb."

Dan, U.S. Air Force, retired

On Fri, 7 May 2004 06:39:09 -0600, "Jeff Crowell"
wrote:

Cub Driver wrote:
Fighter pilots do like to get into trouble on their days off, don't
they?

Heh. Not that I was ever a fighter pilot, but...

I do remember foindly the time I got thrown out of an Air
Farce O-Club because a particularly stuffy general took a
disliking to my and my buds' Scarves, Flying, Field
Expedient, Type I ( an appropriate length of toilet paper,
wrapped round our necks). Hell, everyone else in the
place had a scarf on at Happy Hour, and at least our
zoombags showed some sign of having been worn to fly
that day.

I recall one of the waning days of my mediocre aviation career,
dropping into Nellis for a weekend X-C. Head to the Q for a quick
douche, don the finest civvies, splash a bit of "sure-****" on the
face so's I smell delightful and head to the bar.

Sure enough the place is Friday night packed with intrepid aviators
and that pleasant by-product of Top Gun "The Movie", the Fighter-Pilot
Groupie!

A few toddys and I strike up a conversation with an attractive young
prospect who seems amenable to dinner and possibly some post-prandial
activities. When I invite her out, she looks and says, "but you aren't
a pilot."

I reply that most assuredly I am--possibly the best and undoubtedly
the most combat experienced aviator in the room.

She says, "no you're not. You're not wearing a flight suit."

So much for the rewards for being clean and well-groomed in a fighter
pilot bar.



Ed Rasimus
Fighter Pilot (USAF-Ret)
"When Thunder Rolled"
Smithsonian Institution Press
ISBN #1-58834-103-8

Ed Rasimus wrote:

snip

I recall one of the waning days of my mediocre aviation career,
dropping into Nellis for a weekend X-C. Head to the Q for a quick
douche, don the finest civvies, splash a bit of "sure-****" on the
face so's I smell delightful and head to the bar.

Sure enough the place is Friday night packed with intrepid aviators
and that pleasant by-product of Top Gun "The Movie", the Fighter-Pilot
Groupie!

A few toddys and I strike up a conversation with an attractive young
prospect who seems amenable to dinner and possibly some post-prandial
activities. When I invite her out, she looks and says, "but you aren't
a pilot."

I reply that most assuredly I am--possibly the best and undoubtedly
the most combat experienced aviator in the room.

She says, "no you're not. You're not wearing a flight suit."

So much for the rewards for being clean and well-groomed in a fighter
pilot bar.

I think her doubts started when you only claimed that you were "possibly"
the best - semi-humility from a fighter jock? ;-)

Guy

On Fri, 07 May 2004 23:08:40 GMT, Guy Alcala
wrote:

Ed Rasimus wrote:

I reply that most assuredly I am--possibly the best and undoubtedly
the most combat experienced aviator in the room.

She says, "no you're not. You're not wearing a flight suit."

So much for the rewards for being clean and well-groomed in a fighter
pilot bar.

I think her doubts started when you only claimed that you were "possibly"
the best - semi-humility from a fighter jock? ;-)

Guy

For years I've contended that false modesty was much worse than no
modesty at all.


Ed Rasimus
Fighter Pilot (USAF-Ret)
"When Thunder Rolled"
Smithsonian Institution Press
ISBN #1-58834-103-8

Ed wrote and Guy quoted:
I recall one of the waning days of my mediocre aviation career,
dropping into Nellis for a weekend X-C. Head to the Q for a quick
douche, don the finest civvies, splash a bit of "sure-****" on the
face so's I smell delightful and head to the bar.

Sure enough the place is Friday night packed with intrepid aviators
and that pleasant by-product of Top Gun "The Movie", the Fighter-Pilot
Groupie!

A few toddys and I strike up a conversation with an attractive young
prospect who seems amenable to dinner and possibly some post-prandial
activities. When I invite her out, she looks and says, "but you aren't
a pilot."

I reply that most assuredly I am--possibly the best and undoubtedly
the most combat experienced aviator in the room.

She says, "no you're not. You're not wearing a flight suit."

So much for the rewards for being clean and well-groomed in a fighter
pilot bar.

I think her doubts started when you only claimed that you were "possibly"
the best - semi-humility from a fighter jock? ;-)

Guy
Nay,
Ed didn't say anything about putting on the large chronometer with 8 dials and
seven buttons. Also he did put on the stinkum, ergo he was not a real pilot.
She probably mistook him for a T-29 driver as opposed to a real pilot, if she
thought he really was an aviator at all.
Probably not wearing his American Optical aviator's shades either.

oxmoron
MFE

Oxmoron1

On 07 May 2004 23:51:01 GMT, (OXMORON1) wrote:

Ed wrote and Guy quoted:
I recall one of the waning days of my mediocre aviation career,
dropping into Nellis for a weekend X-C. Head to the Q for a quick
douche, don the finest civvies, splash a bit of "sure-****" on the
face so's I smell delightful and head to the bar.

A few toddys and I strike up a conversation with an attractive young
prospect who seems amenable to dinner and possibly some post-prandial
activities. When I invite her out, she looks and says, "but you aren't
a pilot."

I reply that most assuredly I am--possibly the best and undoubtedly
the most combat experienced aviator in the room.

She says, "no you're not. You're not wearing a flight suit."

I think her doubts started when you only claimed that you were "possibly"
the best - semi-humility from a fighter jock? ;-)

Guy
Nay,
Ed didn't say anything about putting on the large chronometer with 8 dials and
seven buttons. Also he did put on the stinkum, ergo he was not a real pilot.
She probably mistook him for a T-29 driver as opposed to a real pilot, if she
thought he really was an aviator at all.
Probably not wearing his American Optical aviator's shades either.

Actually, it is only slick-wings that don't apply a dab of high
quality sure-**** before evening one-v-one sorties. Senior pilots and
toilet seat owners always meet the highest aromatic standards.

I did have the custom black-bezel GMT-Master Rolex prominently
displayed and was wearing my aviator style Serengetti Drivers in the
bar. Must also note that my heavy gold two-baht chain and personalized
Buddha were visible through the open collar of my spread-collar,
subtly flowered polyester Saturday Day Night Fever Travolta shirt.

No way she could mistake me for anything but a tactical aviator.


Ed Rasimus
Fighter Pilot (USAF-Ret)
"When Thunder Rolled"
Smithsonian Institution Press
ISBN #1-58834-103-8

Ed described his suave dress and noted the appropriate wearing on the watch
with shades and stated:

No way she could mistake me for anything but a tactical aviator.

It all seems correct, you appear to have done the proper mission planning. Two
questions come to mind....

1. Where you making the flying movements with the hands? As opposed to just
grabbing ass?
2. Where you having a bad hair day?

Oxmoron1
MFE

On 08 May 2004 16:28:28 GMT, (OXMORON1) wrote:

Ed described his suave dress and noted the appropriate wearing on the watch
with shades and stated:

No way she could mistake me for anything but a tactical aviator.

It all seems correct, you appear to have done the proper mission planning. Two
questions come to mind....

1. Where you making the flying movements with the hands? As opposed to just
grabbing ass?
2. Where you having a bad hair day?

Tactics were perfect. I moved into position abeam a fellow aviator and
the target. I quickly made a feint toward the Fighter Weapons School
student with a derogatory comment about how easy it was to film the
tennis-court sized planform of his Ego Jet, then shifted focus quickly
to the true objective before he could respond properly. Then by
deflecting his rebuttal I quickly engaged the SYT in some dazzling
repartee regarding the fallacy of the large watch/physical anatomy
rumor that BUFF pilots have been spreading about the tactical
community for years.

I shot my watch a couple of times, demonstrated the proper briefing
technique for demonstrating a barrel-roll attack in one single,
non-stop motion without reversal of the hand or dislocating of the
wrist.

Much like Warren Zevon's Werewolf of London, my hair was perfect.
Which could have been my downfall, since the rest of the tactical
types in goatskins still had vestiges of "helmet-hair."



Ed Rasimus
Fighter Pilot (USAF-Ret)
"When Thunder Rolled"
Smithsonian Institution Press
ISBN #1-58834-103-8

On Wed, 5 May 2004 18:51:31 -0400, "Leslie Swartz" wrote:

No, Matt, if she were a MAN here career would have been over. In today's
military, she'll be 0-6 BTZ and more than likely a one-button within the
next five years.

"Equal" opportunity doncha know.

Steve Swartz

You certainly hit the nail on the head!!!! The feminazis will be holding rallies
any day now, and SACOF****S, oops, I mean DACOWITS will be screaming
bloody murder.

Al Minyard

On Fri, 07 May 2004 05:20:57 -0400, Cub Driver wrote:

On Thu, 06 May 2004 14:54:45 -0600, Ed Rasimus
wrote:

For a while at Nellis we wanted to all wear missileer badges--only we
were going to wear them horizontally just below our wings.

Fighter pilots do like to get into trouble on their days off, don't
they?


all the best -- Dan Ford
email: (put Cubdriver in subject line)

They must, they certainly do it with an amazing degree of regularity :-)
Being a pilot and being in "hack" were nearly synonymous!!

Al Minyard